My Story

The ability to Perceive

2010-04-08T21:42:00.002+08:00

Hi all who still read this blog,

I'll like to pin down some of my thoughts. As I read Kristie's blog, I find myself recognising some stuffs.

To begin with, I realise that when we do things, people perceive things differently. For Example, I like to help people with the administrative stuffs and do it willingly trying to help as much as I can. However, some people perceive it as being used by others.

Whether it is genuine that people is really just making used of me, I think the heart attitude is key. If I treat everyone the same, just as God loves me and my brothers and sisters in Christ, I can stand blameless before God and say I didnt live a double standard and my heart attitude is right.

Father, I pray that God, You may protect me. I pray that this platoon that I am working with God-centered people. It is not about shifting blame but in honouring You. I pray that I will not fall into the trap of judging. Allow Holy Spirit to fill me in, lead me and guide me to be an authoritative parents, standing firm yet filled with love.
In this platoon, I pray for the commanders, for unity in the platoon commanders. I pray that we will be able to work together as a team and not individuals. I pray that this platoon will honour You. In Jesus Name, Amen

Blessed be Your name!!

2010-03-16T19:23:00.002+08:00

Today, I feel damn sad. I was simply just indulging in a lot of reflection. I knew I wasn't a good Commander. Yet, I'll try to be one... I failed in my duties as a SC. I want to Honour God and fulfil my duty as a SC. I think there are steps that can fulfil both. However, I may not have found the right steps to do so. I end up either caught up with either.

Opinions about me has arise.. I don't really know how to handle. I was admonish for some stuffs I did. I don't find that it is my fault but I think in the hearts of them, I am nothing. It is like, have me or without me, it doesn't make a difference.

I am probably a person who is not loved by others. There are 2 reasons. One is I can be too Holy that people shuns me. Another reason could be just that people thinks that I am really that bad. I think I am the latter...

In any case, all glory to God. Amen

A day of mixed feelings!

2010-02-09T20:42:00.002+08:00

Today, I started off angry with someone. Someone whom I don't really like. I actually intend to by-pass the chain of Command to report about this person. Yet I didnt.

I watched "Facing the Giants" again. It is like "wow". My faith was literally rekindled. I wanted more of God. I want to have a new working, team philoshopy. What is the purpose of my life?

I remember in the movie, the Coach, Grant Taylor said this, "It has been all about us. But as I read this book(bible), I realised that it is not largely about God. It is not to get glory, make money and die. If we win every game but miss this pt(to honour God). Football means nothing. Football is just a way to honour God."

So one of the player asked," So you think God cares about football?"

He answered, "He cares about your faith. If your faith is in football, He cares about football because He cares about you. But it is not about Football but it is in our lives, our relationships, respect for authories, football and at home surfing the internet. When we win, we praise Him, we lose we praise Him"

This really hit my heart. I was tearing when I watch the movie about the wife of Coach Taylor supporting him by his side. The kind of faith that Coach Taylor has.

The part when the Team, Shiloh Eages, didnt get into the playoffs but the Princeton high was disqualified. He says this to his team," I want to let you know that when we play in a team that honours Him, His blessings follows" This is so powerful. God so loved His blessings that He supplies even more. Coach Taylor only wanted a win in the Playoffs but he was blessed with the chance to take on the Giants in the State Championship.

I was really hit. Managed to spend some time praying and surrendering my life to the Lord. It is really not about me. But it is about God. Jesus. I'll remember this,
"Attitude is the aroma of your heart."

I will remember this verse. Matt 19:26 - With God, all things are possible!!!

I receive this in my inner man.

May the Glory and honour be unto God!!

Amen

A not so happy morning

2010-01-19T11:40:00.002+08:00

Today started off with not so well. Why? I was just feeling sad after today's Route March. I was starting to feel inferior. I was starting to feel indifferent. I was asking whyself, where did my anger come about? Why did I keep on pushing the them to walk when they are struggling? Why am I so angry? Did it come out of good faith that I really want him to walk more and complete the march?

I really wondered. I guess the anger came when I think I'm seeking the approval of man. When people around me start pushing the man on. I started too. I guess this is why I am so angry. When everything ended, he want to fall out, I wanted the I/C to check strength first. It doesnt matter what happened.

I just so sad and angry with myself. Why I don't know how to react. Why I am concern....I just disappointed in myself!!

Facebook God wants you to know application share with me that I can choose the day to be disappointing or not... I think it's very true....

Thank God

New born life

2010-01-11T10:28:00.003+08:00

Today has been a special day. I think after my long weekend, I had learned a lot. 1st was the message from Cell, Love in Action. 1 Cor 13:4-7 - Love is patient, Love is kind, Love does not envy, Love does not boast. It is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrong. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always persevere.

As Gim lead us in a time of sharing this weekend, there is something that triggers in me. How I am not loving. Be it towards my family, towards my cell, towards my friends, etc. It is like a form of hurt in me.

As I enter into service today, I praise God for who He is. He is sovereign. As Pastor Jenn preached in service, the 3 roles of the boat in Luke 5:1-11, I was deeply touched. My Purpose in Army. The one that triggers me is the point no. 2: A fishing boat still being used as a fishing boat. My role in army is to help to train soldiers to be more seasoned soldiers. Soldiers who can defend the country. If the need comes, I need to be harsh because my objective is to train them to be disciplined and able to achieve a swift and decisive victory should deterrence fail.

I deeply touched when I saw my first aunt(Maternal). She is currently now in Hospitial. She hopes to see my brother get married. I pray that she will be. In eagerness and desperation, I pray that healing be upon her. I pray that God, You will be there for her. That is the measure of love she has for everyone of us.

R.E.S.T

I AM A FUCKED UP PERSON!!!!

2009-12-22T18:57:00.002+08:00

I CAN'T IMAGINED HOW FUCKED UP I AM!!!!

WHY AM BEING SANDWICHED RIGHT NOW?
WHY AM I FEELING SO MUCH PRESSURE!!!!
WHY AM I GOING TO DISAPPOINT PEOPLE WHEN I PROMISED THEM!!!
WHY! WHY ! WHY!

WHY I AGREE TO TAKE UP DUTIES DURING MY LEAVE!!!
WHY!!!?? WHY!!! WHY!!!!

WHY I HATE MY LIFE?
WHY I FEEL SO ANGRY???
WHY I FEEL SO FUCKED UP???

WHY CAN'T I JUST AWOL!!!!

I AM JUST A STUPID IDIOT!!!

I FEEL LIKE CRYING!!!!
YET I CAN'T !!!!

WHY AM I ARROWED A DUTY IN THE MIDDLE OF MY LEAVE!!!!

I THINK I SHOULD JUST END MY LIFE!!!
YET GOD GIVES ME LIFE!!

Life

2009-12-22T13:48:00.002+08:00

Wow..

I didn't know why I have a urge to blog. I wanted to share my life. Let me begin with my life at the start of the year.

Starting this year, I was feeling a bit uncomfortable to a certain extent. This is because Kok Hong left cell on 31 Dec 2009. He was my pillar of dependence back then. Almost everything, big or small, I confided with him. Trusting that he will guide me and help me through the life up ahead of me. Furthermore, I was struggling hard with vulgarities since I was in the army. Yet, Kok Hong didn't leave me in a lurch. He had in mind Ben Yuan, my mentor in church to be my mentor, guiding me.

My life in command school was a struggle spiritually. I do not have a spiritual buddy whom I can talk to until ASLC. I struggle deeply with the sins. I felt helpless back then.

My sins issue was worsen in the month of Sept. I kept asking myself in terms of psychological terms. Am I lacking in love? Security? Control? To a certain extent, I was even "pushing the blame" to one of girl which I thought I like. I was thinking, "Maybe it is because I don't feel accepted when she rejected me. Maybe I don't feel love". After months of pondering, I realised I am just going in circles. It was just my coping mechanism. It was the wrong coping mechanism. I realised that it is purely my own self. It was I who chose to sin against the temple of God.

Recently, I had been doing reports for my group of accountability partners. I realised how far I am with God. Now in church, I shifted cell, I feel that I am growing in a sense, I find myself in the days of my JC, being on fire for God. I want to desire more of God. I come to the point of questioning myself for everything done just to check if I had honour God in all of my ways.

I think last night, God gave me a dream. A dream that was so real. This dream is something about black magic. I was in a room. I entered this room with a monster in front of me. He was asking me to drink a "portion" that will make me as disgusting as him. It was tempting. Somehow, I don't know why I felt disgusted by it and start throwing up. In a few moments, I find myself throwing up water. When I was awaken, I was praying to God, asking Him,"Why?". Somehow, I felt that it is like a form of purification. A form in which I throw up the bads. It also taught me(aligned with the bible principle) that I need to be frustrated enough that I will commit to God.

God, Sorry for the many wrong things that I've done. Today, I want to make a decision. A choice to follow you again. It is wrong of me to do things that defile you. Lord, I seek Your ways. May you forgive me. Let Your Will be done. Thanks for this dream. I pray that I will be more closer to you like this song:

Draw me close to you
Never let me go
I lay it all down again
Just to know that I'm your friend

You are my desire
No one else will do
Coz nothing else could take your place
To feel the warmth of your embrace
Help me find the way
Bring me back to You

You're all I want
You're all I never needed
You're all I want
Help me know you are near

2008-12-07T14:04:00.002+08:00

Wow....It's been real long since I last posted. Since I am free, I will post something..

1st event for the Dec is none other than the enlistment on 12 Dec to BMTC Sch 1. This is pretty exciting plus a bit of fearing. Exciting because I will meet new people and the kind of people who are very different. Fearful because there a a high uncertainty probability. Haha... What a mixed kind of feelings..

2nd event will be Christmas Service. Looking forward to Christmas Service!!! haha...

3rd event will be meeting up with people. I want to meet up with people to chill, to help them. I do not know how much I can help but just wanted to help people. Maybe at this current position, I cant say much about helping people in cell, I do really want to be that listening ear to everyone. Sensitivity issues are present..Yet I felt that I wanted to help and meet up. So dilemma.. Haix...haha....Well...left today, Mon, tues, Wed and Thurs left. Fri is the day...Left about 4.5days.. Hope to make full use of the time bah... I pray for strength to withstand all temptations and just want to be faithful to God. Amen

Haix...Whatever things are...Just leave it to God bah....haha....

Facing the Giants

2008-10-21T08:50:00.002+08:00

I guess if you look back my posts to Dec last year. You probably will see the post on Facing the Giants.

Today, I was tempted initially to look at things I should see. God spoke to me when I searched for Corrinne May "5 loaves and 2 fishes". What is more is that I review some of the scenes in Facing the Giants. I cant help crying and sharing about the movie. I viewed the few excerpts of the video. I was like,"God, I didnt trust you enough". In this period of study leave, why didnt I be faithful and trusted on to my own strength by studying prolonged hours? I am sincerely Sorry Lord.
There are times whereby I felt God wasnt speaking to me until a few days back when God gave me a dream. I dreamt of myself preaching and praying for people although people are leaving. Today, I see the trials on the coach in the Facing the Giants. I am really confronted and encouraged. How much do I trust God? I knew God has been speaking into my life. I believe these wont be able to come without prayers from my cell and people who care for me. I just realised that whenever when we feel righteous, could it be from our pride due to my competence in the area?
Lord, Forgive me of my sins. Let me embrace You again with love. Not to trust on my strength but Yours Lord.

Thank You for the FAcing the Giants. It has definitely confronted me. God, thank You. I commit my all to You. I am no longer myself but living for You. Tear me down Lord to mend me again. Just like how changes are done when we need to dismantle the whole part to replace it with new stuff.
I need You Father. All the time, I also struggle with who I worship coz inner voice has been debating. Now I see that You are moving. You told me,"Who you are worshipping is from the heart"(i.e if u think who u are worshipping, you will be worshipping that). Thank You!

I believe my heart has been humbled. I want to Honour and Glorify You. Will You come and be with me till the end of the age? Guide me Lord. Let me press on to You. Not my own strength.

Thank You Lord...

2008-10-07T19:33:00.001+08:00

Countdown To 'A' Level

2008-09-29T20:29:00.002+08:00

Rounding up For the Month of September

Although I think there isn't much people who look to my blog, I think I will just update and round up the month of September.

These few weeks in the month of September comprises of many ups and downs. It was never easy to overcome the hurdles. However, by God's Grace, I was able to tide through those down moments and praise the Lord in those up down.

A more specific explanation is the temptations. I had been tempted quite many times this week(I think there are at least 3). However, God has been Gracious. He has brought a person to me. The person is none other than Benjamin Yuan. He entered into my life by recommending me a book titled, "Breaking Free from Sexual Addictions and the Healing Power of Jesus". This book is really awesome. I can never forget the stories that were thought in the book. Russel(the author) was so explicit in the interpretation in both biblical views and psychological views. I think I learned a lot. 2 weeks of reading this book has definitely allow me to understand myself and others better. Thank You God!!
This is by far, the down moments of my life that God raised me up from the guilt that results from these temptations.

Good moments are moments where I can reach out to God so much more. I am able to listen and hear God by being more sensitive. Although there are times which I do not know whether the views/word/visions were from me or from God, I believe God has definitely came to minister to me in the form of thoughts, perspectives. Thank You God!!

There are more ups and downs which I don't think I have much time to explain more. All I can say is that JC life has made me realised how cruel life sometimes can be. Cruel in a sense when friends are sometimes so sarcastic. But Who Am I to judge? Have I not done the same to them? Haix. To people out there, don't follow my footsteps to judge. Learn not to judge anymore. Let God be the judge.

In my struggle with God in unison of heart mind soul, God has definitely been here with me and reassuring me. I always found peace reading the word when my heart and my mind are no longer in unison in the praise of the Lord. Thank You God for being so faithful.

I shall end my round up with this. Even though you may fall time and time. God accept you for who you are. Live for God and let your actions be pleasing to God.

I pray for All people who see my blog to have a good sense of how God can work in your life where you may feel self-worthless. God is there for you. I pray a word of Blessing into your life by the name of Jesus. Amen

2008-07-07T19:47:00.002+08:00

I think I am not "cut" for Evangelism yet.

I think I am not "cut" for Evangelism now. This is because the "cell" session has been quite bad. One of the things that my cell leader, Kok Hong, said minister to me. That is what I had been told to do(speaking to Pastor,etc) but I didn't speak to them at all.

God's Will God's Way not MY way....

I felt really confronted by the Holy Spirit about it.

God, I desire for things of cell to occur in YJC but things aren't getting right.

Father, I ask that You will teach me what to do. not to focus onto my own ways but Yours. In Jesus Name I pray Amen

2008-06-15T12:39:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was a super awesome day. I was being prophecise over by Mary, a prophetess. It was really awesome. Music, Shepherd, Training, Decision-making, Travelling. All things are so awesome. The travelling is like a confirmation of evangelist.....Wow...I am doing something awesome for God's Kingdom. Shall do the training to become an evangelist.. Purpose to be evangelist....Should I then take on Theologist course in University... That will be like Bible College like that....hehe...haha...

Yesterday, Cell Leader, KH, lent me some of the notes on the masterplan of Evangelism....Was so wonderful...The most impactful of all the various plans, I found the part about a few years of training a few close disciples so that their lives can be reproduced rather than to have mass recruitment to keep the program going...hehe...

AWESOME DAY!!!! TODAY'S FATHER'S DAY!!!

LET THIS BE A PRAYER TO ALL FATHERS ON EARTH.

Thank You Heavenly Father for giving us these father who will guide us as you empower them with the authority us as student. Though words are little but the love never dies. the method of showing love is different but they meant well and love us just like You did. Every father, like our Heavenly Father, shows us unconditional love. I pray that all fathers on earth shall receive a word from the Father and that they will have a new resolution about things in their lives and all done in Glory and Honour of our Heavenly Father. I pray this in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen!!

2008-06-01T18:57:00.003+08:00

Its been long since I last blog. Today I had some reflections after watch Chronicles of Narnia. I thought it will be very meaningful if I pen it down here. Before, I go into that, I shall talk about my life.

Many may have known that I am in a time of struggle with the Lord. I am struggling with my temptation. Just 1 month ago, I commit the sin again after 5 months after I was delivered. I commit another fast to the Lord once again. This time round, I wasn't sure if He was there. I told myself, the Lord has been with me and I pray throughout that the fast will be of H onour and Glory to the Lord. Recently, I just had my Block Test for G.P. I wasn't sure what to write but I wrote on the question," Good decision are made from the mind rather than the heart. What do you think?" I didn't know why I attempt it. It is probably something that was close to my heart. I did not know what will happen but I will just commit to the Lord how things may happen.

Just yesterday, I was reading 1 Cor. 1 -4 as I went to clean the wake me up room with my cell group. The study bible with the notes. I remember one particular note that says, not retaliate but endure. I also remember another that says not just do with Human Intelligence but of the Spirit. I do not know what it really meant actually. At that point of time, I just know that I can't trust my mind cause it is purely human intelligence. Shortly after it, I went for service. I somehow sense the Lord saying, " so what being spiritual when you can't follow my Word of helping others". At that point of time, I was really ashamed of myself and surrender it all to the Lord. I prostulate and said Lord, Forgive me for all the wrongs that I had done. I somehow felt that these 2 sort of clashes but one thing in common is the Spirit.

Today, spending time with cell group was not too bad. I was as usual quiet. I don't know why but I just don't seem able to fit in at that point of time. When we go up to the cinema, as I watch the progress, I first find about how corrupted and how evil man is. The scene whereby the king was giving the instructions to kill the prince. I simply do not know what else to describe a man's heart. When I saw the scene of lucy seeing the Lion(forget what it meant), it reminds me of the scene that the church showed once about the holy grail when the book says walk on air. It simply remind me of Faith. When I see the scene of the king peter fighting the troops of the enemy, I was really pleasantly surprised about how he continued on. The Tomb area was like sealed. And given the situation, he just lead all the animals to fight it bravely. Some may bravely die as martyr. I was like, am I brave to die as a martyr for the Lord? I seen how king peter really did his best at the battlefield just like the one in the fortification of the enemy. Many died in the fortification and king peter was really sad. Temptation was there to free a spirit to help but it was dismissed when friends helped. So king peter fought and when he instructed lucy to find the Lion for reinforcement, he believed that lucy will come back with reinforcement. True enough, they believe in faith that lucy will come back. The battle was won by the Narian... It just showed that even in our deepest struggles and situation when we do all out and believe that God will come with His strength, He will come and help you. you may be in the losing end on the surface but when the Lord comes, He will save you and turn the situation around for the Lord can summon all His angels to help you just like how the Lion summon the waters and trees.

I seriously felt that God was speaking to me. From 1 Cor. to Church Service to this movie. I sense that the Lord speaks," Ronald, do not rely on the intelligence that you have but believe that the Spirit will bring you through. In faith, you will wait upon my name and I will come at my perfect timing to help you. Faith without deeds are dead. " I just felt that this was the message that the Lord speaks.

I believe He will continue to speak and I want to be with Him evermore. Thank You Lord for the week for the time. I come to You with thanksgiving. Amen

2008-04-26T08:27:00.002+08:00

Wow....It's been about one month after my last post... Here to update my readers(hopefully there is)......

First, I will like to thank God for a wonderful week. I think I have been blessed by the Lord who remain faithful despite the fact that I fall short. I thank You for the wonderful Grace.. What astonished me was the fact that God came to me once again. He gave me the chance to lead a life led by the Holy Spirit as I have asking for it since yesterday.

Second, I come to the Lord with Thanksgiving for giving me wonderful people like Kok Hong, Stephanie Seah, Grace Yew and Benjamin Chua. They have help me in my spiritual growth and constantly remind me of my actions. Not saying the rest of cell is not impt as Lord Jesus have also given me this chance to be with you guys for such a wonderful time...

Thirdly, I thank God for 2 friends whom I pray that I can disciple them in school. I pray that they will be able to come to You with Thanksgiving.

Amen

2008-03-20T16:58:00.002+08:00

Today since I am free, I am here to blog.

My heart sank today though it is the last paper of my Block Test. A couple of subjects, I think I have screwed up. They are, General Paper, Economics, Chemistry and Mathematics.

For the General Paper, I did the question on "Economic Growth should be pursued at any price" What are your views. Guess what? I wrote Economic Growth should be pursued due to the increase in Technology and a reduction in unemployment which will bring about lesser social tension such as Sri Lanka which the Tamils are not given equal rights and constitute the high percentage of unemployment and thus LTTE was established. As for why Economic growth should not be pursued at any price is due to Inflation which leads to Trade Deficit which will in turn leads to lesser economic growth or even negative economic growth. I also bring the point of Lesser productivity as when more investors invest in a country(especially labour intensive), they will pollute and people living around the place will be sick and the productivity will fall. I also bring the point of higher income disparity which will widen the income gap. I also bring the point of Lower standard of living as inflation rate rises and thus Real GDP per capita will be lesser...

For the Economics Paper, I was astonished by the question about SMRT and SBS Transit. Despite SBS Transit's monopoly on the NEL, why will it operating at a loss? I seriously remember the 3 barriers to entry...However, there is no application!!! Aggressive Advertising and Marketing Strategies I don't think they have because they have not done anything to make it less competitive. Does no driver means less competitive? no right? the output is much smaller as SBS transit conquer only 18 stops(if I rmb correctly) and SMRT control NS and EW line which is 27 each...How then will their cost be low....I dunno what I have written. All I can do is press on to the Lord.

For Chemistry paper, I find it do-able. I was able to do the questions despite some hard question on Thermochemistry and Chemical Equilibrium. Thus, I do not know how well I did. 1 Question that was ironical was that they sae that a ester is formed in an equilibrium when it evaporates, predict the equilibrium. How Stupid I am to say that it shift to the left when the esters formed is on the right and it should be the equilibrium position shifting to the right. How well have I remember my content, Le-Chatelier's Principle.

For Mathematics paper today, it was really difficult.. Complex numbers questions are so hard!!! I can't do....my DE question also..Cost me 12 marks... After a tabulation, I found out that I had approximately 40marks blank but the last few, I hope to earn a few more marks and I really pray that there is no careless mistakes. If not, I really will flunk the paper which I do not want.

Lord Jesus had shown be different things for different papers. For the G.P paper, Lord Jesus has shown me that there must be complete trust in Him. For the Economics and Physics Paper, Lord Jesus showed me that He has not failed on me and I should not fail on Him. For Chemistry paper, I didn't really sense God speaking to me but I know He is moving. For Mathematics Paper, Lord Jesus tells me that complacency due to men's flattery will be the pitfall of the task given. Due to the complacency, I didn't study much and to my horror, a number of questions I can't do.

All in all, no matter what happen, whether I pass or I fail this Block Test, I praise Him - Quoting from "Facing the Giants". Probably this time round I will drop to H1 Econs. Maybe dropping to H1 Econs may be a relief for me to lift my burden and to concentrate much better due to the extra time I may have. All committed to my Lord Jesus Christ and I shall obey Him as He Commands..

Amen

2008-03-14T22:54:00.002+08:00

Jesus,

Today, I did something which was rather wrong, that is to try to get 2 pple back onto the platform. I failed. I failed to do so and I have deeply hurt someone. Furthermore, this is my sister-in-Christ. What position am I in the judgement? Did I judge? I really do not know. This is because I seriously only wanted things to get better but things turn out otherwise.

Jesus, as I speak to Ben just now, I thank You Lord for sending Your Word through Him. Romans 14 and Hebrews 5 reminds me of how to treat my brothers and sister in Christ. I have probably mis-handled this case. I probably won't want to get involved anymore. Jesus, I want to desire more of You and to able to do things like You. I have hurt someone who shouldn't be hurt.

I feel really bad and it was less when Ben reminded me that my motive is not to hurt her delibrately. I felt that Jesus, this is Your way of speaking to me that,"Hey, You are the prince of the highest King, why do you want to feel that way?" I think that was a really good reminder.

Jesus, my Lord and Saviour, I seek Your forgiveness for all that I have done. I'm sorry Lord for all the things I've made it for everything should be about You, not me.

After all that happens, I believe God, this may have occur at Your timing for a purpose, let me see beyond all this conflict and come before You my Lord to tide this through for I believe in You, I will tide through every crisis I will have....

Thank You Lord Jesus for Your Amazing Grace. There is no one else like You..

Amen..

2008-03-07T19:00:00.002+08:00

Today, I have a weird and odd day.

Let me start from the start. Early in the morning, I have this dream. The part that I remember was that there was a cell member, Regina coming rushing to me that to solve these problems, I need the 3Rs. However, when I woke up, I can only remember 1 - Respect. I believe it was God who deliver that message to me but I didn't quite get the whole chunk of the dream....

When I reached school, I actually told my friend that he must be sleeping late at night as he has watery eyes. I get rather pissed off today but I decided to keep mum and not tell anyone. Today, after me saying all that, the person said it back to me. To me, I shouldn't have felt pissed off. However, I really cannot take it anymore. I can't suppress any longer. I am really pissed that my friends do not believe my words. I felt that they had jump to conclusions. I can't suppress it anymore!!!!

Another blow that I suffered today was the release of the 'A' level results. I was super disappointed with myself. I felt that I should have gotten at least a 'B'. However, I only gotten a 'C'. It is really disappointing. I was sort of depressed today after the results. I didn't mean to hurt my friend today. I really thought that I could do better. My friend who got an 'E' said that I'm showing off. I really felt really bad and sad. I shouldn't have sent that message across. Now, I have a greater decision to make. Retake or not to retake?

Father in Heaven, Lord Jesus,
I want to commit these things into Your hand. Whatever it is, I only want to listen and obey You. Let all be done with Your Glory. Let me be once again cleansed. Thank You Jesus. I really have no idea where to start on. Last year, I do put in efforts for my CL last year but I got a 'C'. I really fear getting 'C's and 'D's for my 'A' levels. I pray for Your blessings of Knowledge and Wisdom and discipline to study. Now Term 2 Block Test is coming up and I am taking 4H2, Lord, I seek Your ways and Your forgiveness for all unrighteous...Thank You Lord. In Jesus Name I pray. Amen

2008-02-20T21:52:00.002+08:00

Hello... It has been quite long since I last update. haha... Let me just update my current situation.

According to my Term 1 Block Test, these are my results,

1. H2 Physics - D
2. H2 Chemistry - E
3. H2 Mathematics - D
4. H2 Economics - U

My updates for the upcoming week.

Week 8(this week)
- Student convention 2008 at HTA on 23 Feb
- H2 Physics SPA Skill C & D ( need prayer for this )

Week 9
- H2 Chemistry SPA Skill B

Week 10
- NAPFA Test ( pull-up, Standing Broad Jump needs practise )
- NCO Camp

Week 11
- March Holiday

Week 12(Term 2 Week 1 )
- Term 2 Block Test

Week 13 ( Term 2 Week 2 )
- H2 Chemistry SPA Skill A

These few weeks, there are a couple of assessments and major examination. Somehow I really feel the stress of the various topics which I am really unclear such as Inflation of Macroeconomics, Planes and complex nos of Maths, Organic chemistry- in preparation of SPA Skill A and Mechanics & Electricity and Magnetism of Physics. So much unclear topics.

This will be my likely schedule for revision.

Week 8
- Physics Mechanics ( in preparation of this week H2 Physics SPA skill C & D )
- Economics- Microeconomics - DD and SS , study along with Ed

Week 9
- Inorganic Chemistry ( in preparation of H2 Chemistry SPA Skill B )
- Mathematics - Sequences & Series coupling with Limits and graph OR Vectors(planes)

Week 10
- Physics - Electricity and Magnetism
- Economics - Microeconomics - Firms and Structure of Firms

Week 11
- Organic Chemistry
- Mathematics - Graphing Techniques, Functions, Inequalities OR complex nos.

Week 12
- All Subjects

2008-01-19T08:35:00.000+08:00

Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I praise You Lord for Your Amazing Grace upon me. I know very well that I did not study much for my Term 1 Block Test. Lord, I really thank You for Your Grace upon me that so far my results are 2 passess and 1 failure. I thank You so much. The movie of "Facing the Giants" reminds me of "If we win, we Praise Him. If we lose, we Praise Him". So Lord, If I pass, I praise You, If I fail, I praise You for You are truely worthy of Praise.

I thank You Lord for blessing Cell Phileo. Cell Phileo was a cell which I grew so much spiritually and now I am still continuing to grow each day. I thank You Lord for that. Over the 2 weeks, I thank Lord for showing Your Grace upon the highly intensive usage of the Yahoo Group which we use to communicate. I thank You for allowing me to do initatives. I truely desire to be a cell leader. I want to serve Your people. They are really nice people whom You called Your Child. They taught me principles in the Bible which I am not familar with. I thank You Lord.

I thank You for Your Grace upon OPSS NPCC unit too. You are Amazing. You allow them to be in divine flow. When I was taking that group for MOI(Knots and Lashings), You allowed me to be patience and showed me truely the way to teach them. You knew my temper wasn't very good and You kept it from "exploding". Thank You Lord.

I thank You for You are worthy of all Praises.

Lord, I seek prayer in You that Lord, I pray for double portion of blessings upon every single people around me. I pray for those 3 whom I wanted to bring to You Lord. I pray against any spirit which is making them busy and that they may come to hear the Good News of Salvation that You will bring about. I thank You so much. Even as now, I enter into the trial year, JC2, Lord, I pray that I will not backslided and I will be bestowed with wisdom and knowledge for the subsequent test and eventually 'A' Levels Examination. I pray that I will be bestowed with the Discipline to study so hard that I will be able to score Lord. I thank You Lord for Your Grace. Even as now, I am going into the Enhance Student Potential(ESP ) Program. I pray that Lord, You will bestowed me with great Time Management that I may continue to Praise You Lord. Lord, I pray for Your Calling of me that Lord, I may know my mission on this very earth that You Created me for. So Lord, I pray that You will bless Lord. In times of trials, I know the Devil is going to penetrate Lord, I pray against the works of the Devil and that I may come under the wings of the Lord for shelter and refuge Lord. I thank You Lord. In Jesus' Name, I declared the Devil powerless. In Jesus' Name, all things are done. In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen
Thank You Lord..Hallelujah...Hallelujah

With all I am

Into Your Hands
I commit again
All I am, For You Lord

You hold my world
In the palms of Your Hands
And I am Yours, Forever

Jesus I believe in You
Jesus I belong to You
You're the reason that I live
You're the reason that I sing
With all I am

I'll walk with You
Wherever You go
Through tears and joy, I'll trust in You

And I will live
In all of Your ways
Your promises, Forever

Jesus I believe in You
Jesus I belong to You
You're the reason I live
You're the reason I sing(X3 )
With all I am

I will worship
I will worship You ( X 2 )

Jesus I believe in You
Jesus I belong to You
You're the reason I live
You're the reason I sing ( X3)
With all I am

After hearing so much, are you convinced that the Lord will do wonderful things in Your life? He has used you so abundantly even before you knew. Have not accepted Christ? You can repeat this prayer as a guide to ask Jesus to be Your Lord and Saviour.

Dear Jesus,

I thank You for Your Word that ministers to me. I want to follow You. I know that my old ways are not Honouring You and I want to deny my old self and ask You to come into my life as my Lord and Saviour. I seek Your leadership into my life and everything I do, I want to Honour You. So, Lord, let me be part of Your Kingdom. In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen.

2008-01-01T13:54:00.000+08:00

Yo....

Happy New Year to everyone out there.

A NEW YEAR, A NEW LIFE, A NEW RESOLUTION

Today, I entered into the New Year 2008. I want a new life. I want a life that is of Honour to God. I pray hard that I will Honour Him and not slide back this year. As many times, during JC2, we will always slide back a little. I am still seeking a new Resolution from God. I pray that I will be able to start ministry in YJC. I pray for the opportunity. I pray for Lord's Resolution...Amen

2007-12-30T00:30:00.001+08:00

God,

I thank You for who You are and the things that You have manifested in me and the segment. In the Segment Camp, During Worship, I juz dunno why I felt like crying as I see God's people taking a knee upon God's Throne. I saw Healing taking place, I saw many things. Lord, You are for sure, real. Thank You.
Today, You have let me see what is Divine Flow. All of the Youth Ministry is simply there to Worship and Praise You so wholeheartedly. Thank You.

In Glory of Your Name, I thank. Amen

PS : If u dunno what is Divine Flow, Divine Flow is a time where God ministers and whateva that was done, the rest will be hyper and do the things as the Holy Spirit Commanded.

2007-12-15T22:51:00.000+08:00

Today's service and sermon is awesome. The worship was so carefree. I believe God really moving in each and everyone of us(the congregation). We will simply singing so freely to our God. I believe God was really pleased. The sermon was also awesome. God really anointed the speaker and it really touch my heart. God was speaking about how He love us through the speaker. He was simply so awesome. Today, I was super engrossed in the speech by the speaker for he is really good. He really showed how God manifest in our lives and used us for His Kingdom. The worship songs lyrics, "Heal my heart and make it clean, opened my eyes to see the things unseen, show me how to love as You love me. Break my heart for what breaks Yours, Everything I am is for Your kingdom's cause, As I walk from earth into eternity" It seemly ministered and really, God was trying to show how He loves me. Even at fellowship with my cell members at Hawker, we will talking rather happily.
So much for the good things. Another thing that brings my spirit down a little was the struggles that my brother in Christ was facing.

Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus

Even as today we come into Your presence, Lord, I pray that You will bless so abundantly upon every single of Your people and even people who will be saved on the Day of Christ(Christmas). I know as the words ministered on Christmas will be a great one and Lord, I pray that Your Amazing Love will never fails as You have said in Your Word. Therefore, Lord, I seek Your blessings over the Christmas Tale and pray that Lord, many will be saved by Your Grace Lord. Father, I pray for blessings over that Son of Yours Lord. You know what he is going through Lord. After much prayers Lord, let Your words be heard. Let him hear why You did it this way. Let him understand. Lord, tomorrow is my competition day for my Fencing(Team Foil). I pray that tomorrow will be a day that I will be able to fence at the pace and which You wanted to be and that I will feel so much peace with You. So Father, I pray that Your magnificant Love will remain in our hearts. We know that You send Your Son, Jesus Christ to die for us on the Cross of Calvary. Father, we know Your love for us. Just let us open our hearts and allows You to manifest in us Lord. Father I thank You and I pray for blessings upon my cell and my friends that they will grow deeper into You and be blessed through my life as my life be a true worship to You and great testimony for Your kingdom. In the most mighty and precious name of Lord Jesus Christ I pray. Amen!!!

GLORY TO FATHER!!!

2007-12-06T23:26:00.001+08:00

Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I do not know why today I was super tempted into the temptations. I was super tempted. This is because this few days, I simply cannot do my homework, I was tempted a lot to succumbbing to it. I seek Your Anointing of Your power to refuse and to rebuke this thing that Devil has used in me. Lord, I know Your Anointing will be empowered over me and that I will be able to be delivered from the evil. Father, I do not know whether the things that I have done, whether is it in Your Righteousness or my own. I done several things, I didn't show respect to my Cadet Inspector Trainees(CITs), I still treat them like NCO. Why Lord do I still treat them this way? Father, Can I be empowered to show more respect to my CITs? I have come to a stage of my life that Lord, I feel I no longer live the life of Your Standards. I am ashamed to be called Your Servant, Your Child. Why Lord should I be deserved a title when I couldn't even met Your Standards? You are so loving yet I am living to what You want me to do. Even the basic respects for Your people, I didn't give. I seek Your Forgiveness. I am a nobody and only significant in Your eyes. Lord, I pray that You will blessed the following people or groups of people for they need You.

1. My Dad
2. My Mum
3. My brother in NS
4. My Brothers and Sister in Christ in Cell Phileo
5. In particular, Phoebe
6. In particular, Aishah,
7. In particular, Pei Ting,
8. In particular, Jurene
9. In particular, Audrey
10. My Fencing Team
11. In particular, Kok Hong
12. In particular, Stephanie Seah
13. In particular, Ivan
14. My OPSS NPCC NCOs/Cadets/CIs/Officers
15. In particular, Fadly
16. In particular, Ong Yee Suan
17. In particular, Tee Shi Yan

Lord, these are the people who have entered into my life through You. You planted them in my life and I receive so much from them that Lord, now I just want to bless them that they may receive the goodness of You. They are wonderful and impact my life.
Now that I have ESP(Enhance Students' Potential) program and NPCC. I pray that my life will not be in a mess but even more organised to place You above everything. I pray that I can manage my time well as of Righteous to You. I pray that whatever that may come, all will be done in Your Glory, in Your Honour. I pray that I will be a good testimony of You. I commit this 17 people or groups of people to You that You may them. In Honour of You, I pray in the mighty name of Jesus, Amen..

Lord, Let me sing this song to You.

Jesus
Beautiful Saviour
God of all Majesty
Risen King

Lamb of God
Holy and Righteous
Blessed Redeemer
Bright morning Star

And the Heaven shout Your Praise
All Creation bows to Worship You

How wonderful
How Beautiful
Name above every name
Exalted high

How wonderful
How beautiful
Jesus Your Name
Name above every Name
Jesus

And I will sing forever
Jesus I love You
Jesus I love You

2007-11-28T21:20:00.000+08:00

Shout to the Lord

My Jesus, My Saviour
Lord, there is none like you
All of my days, I want to praise
The wonders of Your mighty love

My comfort, my shelter
Tower of Refuge and Strength
Let every breath, all that I am
Never Cease to Worship You

Shout to the Lord, All the Earth
Let us sing
Power and Majesty, Praise to the king
Mountain Bows down and the
seas will roar
At the sound of Your name

I sing for Joy at the works of Your hand
Forever I love You, Forever I stand
Nothing compares to the Promise
I have in You

Lord, even as I want to commit this Song of Praise, "Shout to the Lord" to You. I want to tell You that I really want to shout out to You. I am discouraged, I am tired. Many things in my life has caused me to feel very fatigue. Especially my passion, NPCC, the Non- Commissioned Officers(NCOs) are rather non-cooperative. It is only in You that You will change their heart supernaturally. My heart is tired. Let all the earth, Let all Glory be Yours in my life. Amen

2007-11-24T22:42:00.001+08:00

Father,Lord Jesus,

I didn't know what went into me. Before Service, I was super hyper over you. During Service, I was super down over myself. What have happened to me??? Gosh.. Lord, I seek Your face!!

2007-11-14T20:49:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus

I think I had let You down. I wasn't at Service last week. I have not live up to Your standard. A lot of things was done in my own righteousness. Lord, be it at ATC, Unit or life, A lot of things I had made several decisions which is not based on Your Will. Sorry Lord. I want to kneel down before You to seek Your Forgiveness. In ATC, I had shouted at my campers to catch their attention, I have not done a single right thing. Deep down in my heart, I feel that I have not done a good job. Lord, I know I shouldn't have feel this but I can't help feeling that I am a failure. My Unit don't listen to me, my cadets are just thinking that their righteousness is the way. My Camp Instructors were rather hard to control. Yet, I didn't do anything at all. As a CI/Coordinator, I guess I have failed in my job. Even the slightest thing such as Greetings, I even overlooked it. In my life, I didn't reflect Christ in me. I wasn't doing excellence, I wasn't doing well for things in my life such as truth and stuff. I am ashamed to fall before You. Lord, I seek Your Face and direct me Lord.

I pray for salvation again in my life and that I may do things in righteous of You Lord. In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen

2007-11-04T10:54:00.000+08:00

Heavenly Father,

I thank You for all the gifts that You have given me. Yesterday, as I went to the altar to be prayed for spiritual gifts, I prayed for the ability to prohecise over Your people and bless Your people through things that You gave me. This is because I could not sense a lot from You in the past. Last night, I had a dream and I believed it was You who gave me. However, I had forgotten it as I was awaken many times at night. Father I also want to thank You for surfacing Yourself as the Provider of the Universe! You are so awesome. As I was toggling between the last $10 that I had, whether to give it as an offering or had it for dinner, I decided to give it to You and trust that You will provide for me. After Service, I thank God for allow Baoren to lend me $6 for my meal and he treated me a drink. Thank You Father! This would not be able to be true without You! I Love You Father!! You have really blessed me a lot. Thank You Jesus.
Yesterday, It was so awesome. Have Cell Praise and Worship in the open! Saw the Cloud Phenomenon and sense that the Lord wants to tell us to Trust in Him no matter what happens!

Thank You Lord for guiding us into a life of victory and many more shall be brought to Christ. In Jesus' Name, I pray, Amen

2007-11-02T18:43:00.000+08:00

Heavenly Father,

First, I want to thank You for Your Grace in my life. You have worked so tremendously in my life. However, I still have questions in mind.

"Am I a child of Your righteous?"
"Have I achieve Your aim for me?"

I seriously do not know. Many things have came into my life. I have been seeking answers from God. So what are the answers? I still don't know.

Lord, has my life been pleasing to You? Have I done things that helps Your people?

I do not know how many hearts have I touched. My cadets are not serious about the training. Am I really wasting their time? I tried not to shout at them but I feel tired. ATC is coming, I want to do my part. However, experienced people have done my task. On one hand, I feel great cause I am rather busy. On the other hand, I had not done my job.

My life seems still down. Lord, I just want to trust that You will help me in these time to alleviate all this feelings. Now, I seek Your Way in my life. Teach me the way You want me to do for my cadets.

Thank You Jesus.

2007-10-30T18:52:00.000+08:00

Heavenly Father,

Today, I sinned against you. I do not know what get into me when my friend, Alex did that to me. I almost wanted to take the chair and hit him. I thank Lord for being there for me even though I sinned against. You convicted my heart that it was not of righteousness to You. I had just embarrassed Your image, Your love, and importantly, I had disgrace Your Name. I found myself very hard to forgive myself of this sin. I seek Your fogiveness. Even as I bow before You at J1-03 then, I felt that I wasn't worthy of You. Now, my heart is simply deviating from what You wanted me to be. Father, I prayed for forgiveness at Your throne and seek for forgiveness at Your Throne that I may be forgiven.

However, I do know that Lord, today, You had blessed over me. Even though my Oral Presentation was considered a flop in my eyes, I will choose to believe that You are the awesome King and will do what is of plan in Your Authority. I do not want to doubt Your Authority. Even as I may face failing my Project Work, I just want to glorify Your Name. You will so awesome to me yet I did so much of sins. I feel embarrased and ashamed to be before Your throne now. On what grounds can I proclaim as Your Child when I sinned so much against You? Lord, come and convict my heart Lord.

Father, I pray that I will be forgiven of my sins and be of righteous to You God. I pray for names to be given for the Best Squad Cadet as well as the SSGT Promotion Lord. I pray that I will stand once again in awe of You.
All these, I pray in the mighty and precious name of Jesus, Amen

2007-10-11T16:06:00.000+08:00

Dear All who is looking at this post now,

I will like to first thank my Cell, Phileo for being a great spiritual stronghold for me. They are really awesome. There are a few which I want to special thanks to ( not because the rest is not important but they had helped me real a lot ).

First on the list is my Cell Leader, Kok Hong. Kok Hong was an awesome Cell Leader. As I first join the cell, I knew him too. He introduce me to Phileo and that was really awesome. For the past 2~4 months, he has really helped me a lot, be it in my overcoming temptation or giving me advices.

Next on the list is Stephanie Seah, She has moved me in a lot of ways. Many times when I was down, I often sms to my cell leaders. She will never fails to comfort me with a warming sms. She is like a motherly figure to me, caring and always been there for me. She is one, I do look up to though there was once I felt that she wasn't being nice but that was because I jumped to conclusions about her even before my facts are right.

The next in line is Benjamin. He was really a great guy. He really helped me in my academics. For the last few months, if won't for his consultation every saturday, I guess I wouldn't have done so much in the promos and may not be able to get through this examination. He even come when he was sick and went home late the last night. He was really a great mentor to me.

The next is Grace Yew. She is really a nice girl that I met. Though she didn't come to cell much due to coursework for the past months, I knew her mind was on God. She simply love God for she has also encourage me alot in my times of academic needs.

I am really blessed to have a cell like this who is always been there for me. It was because of such a great cell that had allowed me to grow so much deeper with my walk with God. They brought me back to God when I deviated from the path that God has planned for me.

Even as I celebrate the last day of my promotional examinations and the last day of fasting, I want to declare God's greatness in my world, in my life. God is really awesome who has blessed me.

From all the fasting that I had, this had lead me to grow deeper into God's Word and the walk with Abba Father. I had deviate from my old means and now is waiting to renewed my heart again. As I complete my last day of fasting today, I want to come before God and proclaim that You are the God of all Wonders. The Lord has died for us for our sins and what I did was just of reasonable service to Him. That He will receive all Glory. Let His Glory flow into your life even more.

After all the thinking, I feel that proclaiming His Greatness to the world is the best gift of blessings to give to His people. He has done a lot for as He blesses over my examination as God of Peace has flowed over me and allowing me to overcome my temptation.

I urge all who has seen this post and have not accepted Christ, I urge you to come to Christ one day to be the witness of His greatness and His Love for you.

2007-10-07T18:32:00.000+08:00

Praise the Lord!!!

Jesus
Beautiful Saviour
God of all Majesty
Risen King

Lamb of God
Holy and Righteous
Blessed Redeemer
Bright morning star

All the heaven shout Your Praise
All Creation bow to Worship You

How Wonderful
How Beautiful
Name above every name
Exalted High

How Wonderful
How Beautiful
Jesus Your Name
Name above every name
Jesus

I will sing forever
Jesus I love You
Jesus I love You

How Wonderful
How Beautiful
Name above every name
Exalted High

How Wonderful
How Beautiful
Jesus Your Name
Name above every name
Jesus

Heavenly Father, Our Awesome God, You are worthy of All Praise for You work in us in the supernatural. As I as Your Servant shall serve you as long as I live. Father, Jesus, Son of God, was sent by you on Earth to walk with us. Till the day, He was sent to the Cross of the Calvary. Lord Jesus, I pray for blessings upon mankind that Your Name shall be praised. All who believe in You will be saved. You are so awesome.

Lord, I pray for blessings of wisdom and knowledge upon me for the next 4 days. Lord, I pray that You will bring me through the Examinations. Lord, I seek Your intervention on Examination. Lord, Let Your Way fall upon me and that I will be brought through over these obstacles of my life.

In the name of Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit that I pray, Amen..

2007-09-19T20:02:00.000+08:00

Heavenly Father,

I WANT TO GLORIFY YOU!!! Today, I didn't do QT, I had not learn more about Your Word which makes me more vulnerable to attacks from the Devil. I pray for forgiveness and discipline to do that every morning. Let Your Glory Flow. I was tempted today to forgo Growth Track on Friday, it really bothers me. I want to Glorify You, Praise You but I had H1 Project Work. Lord, TEACH ME! Teach me what to do!! Lord, I feel I am stretched. Lord, Allow Your Holy Spirit to TEACH ME.. I am desperate for Your Divine intervention. Lord, Bless Me and everyone so that We can act according to Your Will. I want to follow Your Will. Lord, Tell Me, What I shall do!

In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen

2007-09-16T09:25:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father,

I thank You for the Grace upon me this few weeks. However, I didn't study. I was without Discipline. Lord, I thank You that Your Word during Cell and Service touched me. At cell, when we are looking at philippians 3 : 10-21, I was touched by the 5 Qualities that You showed through Pastor Benny Ho. They are, Desire, Dedication, Direction, Determination and Discipline.

These Words really ministered to me. This is especially so when there is further elaboration at Discipline whereby Discipline turn resolutions to results, Discipline is long term, not short term, Discipline is better in a group. I was amazed by Your Word. I truely believe so as well. It taught me a lot of this. I thank You for that.

At Service, Your Word of Stretching really moved my heart. This is because, I can feel that I am stretched as in my workload is piling up as days goes. I am stretched to do well for the examinations. I thank You for the Word.

My Life was awesome. I surrender my Life to You. I want to glorify You. Let all who experience Your Grace to come before You and Praise You. Though I didn't Study much but I know that Lord, You will allow me to grasp all the important concepts in the revision lectures for You are so awesome. I will pay real attention at these lectures. Thank You Lord for the Grace.

Praise You!!

The Splendour of the King
Clothed in Majesty
All the earth rejoice
All the earth rejoice

How Great is our God
Sing with me
How Great is our God
And all will see how Great
How Great is our God

How Great is our God
Sing with me
How Great is our God
And all will see how Great
How Great is our God

The Godhead Three in one
Father Spirit Son
The Lion and the Lamb
The Lion and the Lamb

How Great is our God
Sing with me
How Great is our God
And all will see how Great
How Great is our God

How Great is our God
Sing with me
How Great is our God
And all will see how Great
How Great is our God

Blessed is the name of the LORD!!
Blessed is the name of the LORD!!
Blessed is the name of the LORD!!

2007-09-13T19:12:00.000+08:00

Hello...It is long since I updated my Blog. I shall now update it!!

Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You for Your Grace upon me for the past month. For this past months, I had been actively involved in my passion, National Police Cadet Corps(NPCC). This month, NPCC, has taught me a lot of things. Cadets and NCOs both disappoint me but I know You Lord, You didn't disappoint me, You didn't turn away when I am almost going into a mode of depression. You raised me up, You convict my heart and told me to reflect on my own actions. I wonder if my cadets and NCOs reflect on their actions as well. Father, God, I pray that You will convict them as well. In Your Kingdom, there is no condemnation, Lord, Allow Your Holy Spirit to move in their hearts. As we now stop all CCAs and concentrate on our examinations, I pray for Lord upon all of NPCC cadets, NCOs and CIs of OPSS to be able to do well for their examination. To Grant them knowledge and wisdom and discipline to study. Allow them to feel the importance of Discipline.Allow the Hearts of my Sec 2 Squad to be convicted and be able to lead a squad next year when they are promoted to the title of Non-Commissioned Officer(NCO).
Recently, I am super worried over my Promo Examination. My results are now like the graph y=-mx+C, Declining. I pray Lord for wisdom and knowledge and the anointing of the Holy Spirit upon me for my Promos Exams. Allow everyone around me to be blessed in the name of the Father, Son and of the Holy Spirit. I will continue to pray for people around me to be blessed with God's Word.In the mighty name of Jesus I pray, Amen

Be the unit of the enforcement of the PICARD. Do as required. Do not allow us to have a chance to scold you. Be on the best behaviour Blessed in the Name of the Lord. Amen

2007-08-10T13:17:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I thank You for the days earlier on for the works You have done in me. You have allow Sze Li to be Your Child and I believe the message was conveyed under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit. Father, I thank You for the Word. I will like to make a recommittment to You that Father, I will serve You fervently. I know Father You have seen me done things and maybe I am taken aback by many things in my life. Father, I sometimes do not know what to do. I prayed for Your Blessings of knowledge and wisdom and the guidance of the Holy Spirit to bring back the prodigals and allow new believers to stay fervently with You. I thank You for allowing me to learn alot of things through the Segment Outreach yesterday. It was awesome. I believe Your presence has touched hearts and in those non-believers that they will think that Your body is a fun one and that We, Your Child is one body with You and united. I gratefully thank You especially upon my first lesson last friday on the topic whereby I am saved by Grace. I thank You for that that all the more I served You fervently. You also made me realised that it is time for me to let go of certain things. I shouldn't be the hidden power behind everything. Instead, let You be the one who will guide the team in Your Righteousness, in Your Authority. I may not have been a good Child but I strive to be a good and pure one. I may not have listen to many people but Father may You allow those people who scolds me or reprimand me to scold in the Mighty name of Jesus, in the Love of Jesus that I may receive conviction to improve in Your Righteousness. May I be the one You used to prophecise over others. Allow Your Perfected love to fill many hearts and come to know You better. Let You be the one who will guide us to the life that You planned for us like You have said in Jeremiah of Bible. You told us the Commandment that You gave and that we shall adhere to these Commandment that will allow us to be save and have eternal life. I pray that many hearts will have the hunger for Your Word, the hunger to have the intimate relationship with You Father, the hunger to serve You forever. In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen.

Father, My parents are now having aches in their body. I pray in the Mighty Name of Jesus that You will heal them with the Healing Powers in the House of God, that they will not feel anymore pain and that they will see Your miracles in action and come to know You Father.Amen.

To those who have read this blog, may I urge you that you will attend a Church service to experience God's Power and Will and what He has for us. Let His Will be done. you may want to say the sinners prayer to accept Christ as follows :

Dear Jesus,

I know what You have done for me and I want to follow You and be in fellowship with You. I am willing to deny my old self and come to live to the name of the Living God, Father and You Lord. I want to serve You fervently and that You will come into my life to eat with me and sit with me. I will like to invite You into my life as my Lord and Saviour so that I will be saved by Your Grace. In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen

GOD BLES YOU!!!

2007-07-29T20:39:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I will like to first thank You for Your Amazing Grace upon me. You allowed my heart to repent and come closer to You Lord. I will like to share my story with You.

In my academic, I really thank Lord for the anointing of the knowledge and wisdom that I am able to do well because of You, Lord. Though, certain subjects were performing at the level which is not ideal, I also thank You for there is a reason why I couldn't get the ideal results. Father, I really pray that my H2 Economics results will improve as well as my H1 General Paper for I am not doing well for this 2 particular subjects. I will keep praying that this two subjects, I will be able to keep bucking up despite all sorts of task I have. Amen

In my CCA, Fencing and NPCC, I thank Lord for exposing me to Fencing whereby I really learn a different style of operation whereby Fencing is a sport which requires agility but NPCC is a uniformed group which emphasis on ruggedness. It was a real great experience. I thank You Father for the exposure. In Fencing, there seems to lack bonding among the various members. I will like to pray for them that we will be bonded close together and that we will be able to help each another out. In NPCC, I feel dissappointed after the parade last week. I first like to seek forgiveness from all Cadets and You Lord that I shouldn't have shouted at them at all costs. I have created an adverse impact. I feel that Lord, I am chained. I am tired. I pray that all this anger containment to be regulated and that Lord, I will be set free. I thank Father for the type of training You have given me through the various avenues that it really helped me in my life. Amen

In Cell, I felt great. I feel more involved in the cell and ministry. I was in-charge of the Prize Presentation sector of the outing on National Day at Sentosa. I was in-charge of celebrating birthdays for my cell members. I felt great when I did that. It may be because of You Lord that You find Joy in me which constitute my strength. I thank You Father and that You will always find Joy in me in the upcoming events.

Lastly, I will like to pray for everyone who looks at this post. The Living God, Jehovah, loves you. He wants to love you that is why He sent His Son, Lord Jesus, to earth to walk with us. So let's be grateful of the things around us and not take things for granted. I pray that you will find Joy in the Lord and come to know God and God will be the guidance in your life. These I pray in Jesus Name, Amen.

PS : To All those out there, if you are free on National Day morning to afternoon, come join my church at Sentosa for some Fun!! Drop me a sms if you want to come. Thanks.

2007-07-17T20:35:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I am sorry that Lord, I had let You down. I had failed to speak of You in front of others. I am not too sure of the bible but Lord, I believe only in You. Chuan Yue, a friend of mine, a former believer of Christ, Prodigals, have come towards me and told me the reality of You. Lord, I was shaken at that point but Lord, I want to tell You that I believe in only You. I am down to repentence for my Sins. Today, I have shaken my stand that Lord, I pray for Your Forgiveness. I want to repent and turn away from my Sins and turn towards You again.

Lord, today, I feel very sad. For the GCE 'A' Level Examination H1 CL or rather GCE 'O' Level Examination ( Higher CL ) Listening Comprehension. There was a need for us to comprehend the passage and think. I was somehow at a loss for I am not used to thinking in Listening Comprehension as other Listening Comprehension that I had come across, the answers are clear cut. I pray for Your Blessings that the paper, despite having done the paper, that Lord You will allow me to pass the H1 CL with flying colours.

Lord, today I feel very sad. For the NPCC Parade meeting today, I was "scolded" for taking up a lot of time of the Senior Non-Commissioned Officers and the Non-Commissioned Officer ( SNCOs and NCO respectively ). The parade was a mess. This is especially so at the Flag part for I have not seen a single parade which have this special handling of the NPCC Flag. I was told that I have taken up too much time that Lord, I feel tired now for I have to be very careful when it comes to planning for I really feel sorry and guilty for the time I have taken up for the Parade.

Lord, I will like to pray for Forgiveness that I have committed several mistakes and that Lord, I pray for blessings and directions of what I have to do now. Lord, May You Minister to me and give me a sense of direction that I may Glorify You. These, I pray in Jesus' Precious Name, Amen

2007-07-10T20:25:00.001+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I thank You for what You had given me. Be it happy or sad moments, Lord, I praise Your Name for You let me undergo it for a reason. I thank You Lord for Your Grace that You will grill me in the thinking process. I may not be the best person, but I strive to be one. Lord, I may have back slided a lot in the process but Lord, I just want to say that You are my One and Only. So many people has disappoint me along the ways but Lord, You have never disappoint me. I thank You. I thank You for the word that was anointed on the 7 July 2007. Those words have been ministered to the many who have come to reach the blog.Thank You.

I will like to continue to pray for my juniors as in the same as 07/07/07 that Lord You will bless them. I pray in Jesus' Precious Name, Amen

PS : All who have seen this post( OPSS NPCC ), I will like you to close your eyes and reflect on our actions over the past few months and ponder if there is a need to do anything else. If yes, approach me or any NCOs. Amen. We will help you as much as possible.

Remember the lyrics of the Songs. It is meaningful. Let the Lord's Word Minister to you once again and lead a life which is done in His Righteousness. Amen

2007-07-09T20:52:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I thank Your Grace for everything around me. I will like to sing praises to You for You have answered my prayer. Hallelujah. Things around me are getting from bad to worst. My scheme was rejected, my fencing teacher actually come to us and told us that they will be switching to wednesday for training. However, I was not able to do so. She requested for NPCC to another but I know I will never do it for NPCC is my life, my passion. I do not know what to do now. I thank You Lord once again for the people You have implanted around me to guide me to You Lord and allow me to grow in Your Righteousness. My hearts are warmed with the words of affirmation from the 3 who tagged. I appreciate and will never ever forget in my entire 6~9months in the corps. I will just like pray for blessings for the ones who are willing to learn to be drawn back to the corps and receive proper training that Lord You will give me the strength to overcome all problems to teach the teachables. I pray that whatever they have learned can be used in Your Righteousness in the future. In Jesus Name I pray, Amen....

2007-07-07T11:02:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

This few days was not well for me. I was getting real emotional these few days. I have been questioning my own ability once again. It really saddens me to see that the Sec 1s and Sec 2s are sort of giving attitude towards me. I feel as if I have offended everyone. I keep thinking about the things I had done. It is true that I was harsh in the past. However, ever since I knew You Lord, I had tried my best to be caring. However, no one sees it. My heart sunk. All my efforts were not appreciated at all. Not to say the Sec 1s and Sec 2s, even my Sec 3s was a disappointment to me. This is especially so during the camp and the training on 4th July 2007. It has made me realised that I was incompetent in execution of my duties.
I wanted very much to do things well but it can never be done without the cooperation of everyone. We want to enforce team spirit in the Corps. I have only another 6~9 months more before I step down from a CI and preparing for my GCE 'A' Level Examination.
It may be a blessing for the cadets that I will not be in the corps as they do not have to look at this freaking face of mine and showed attitude. My life revolves around You, NPCC, Studies and Fencing. However, Lord, I feel real disappointed in the unit.

Lord, I want to pray for my cadets, NCOs, CIs and Officers, that Lord You will bless each and everyone of them with the knowledge, the skills that will be required that Lord for the cadets that they will be enthusiastic over the lessons and have a never-dying NP spirit and shall always be the ones who can make a difference to what the unit has now. I will like to pray for the NCOs that they will be given the wisdom to be able to apply what they have learned over the past few years such as drills, campcraft, and many more but most importantly, Method of Instruction. Without Method of Instructions, It is like a handicap to their lesson execution that Lord I just pray for such blessings upon them. For the CIs, I pray that each and every CI will be able to come down for training inclusive of me that we will be able to observe the cadets, NCOs to allow them to improve so that each and everyone of us will learn over the years. I will like to pray that all the heavy schedules shall be removed as these schedules are like Satan's way of cooping us and not allowing us to do our best to serve the corps. Lastly, I will like to pray for the Officers that Lord You will be able to bless them with the great leadership to lead the unit to a higher level. These, I pray in Jesus' Name, Amen.

PS : It is very disheartening to see so many of us making the same old mistakes again and again. Any NPCC cadets/NCOs who see this, May I ask that we will improve as the days go by.

This song may not be of significance to you but it is meaningful
<<>> ; Diana Ross

Don't lose your way
with each passing day
you come so far
don't throw it away
live believing
dreams are for weaving
wonders are waiting to start
Live your story
Faith, hope and Glory
Hold to the truth in your heart

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

Souls in the wind
Must learn how to bend
Seek out a star
Hold on to the end
Valley, Mountain
There is a fountain
Washes our tears all away

Words are swaying
Sombody is praying
Please let us come home to stay

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

When we are out there in the dark
We'll dream about the sun
In the dark we'll feel the light
Warm our hearts, everyone

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
As high as souls can fly
The clouds roll by
For you and I

It has come to tell us that we shall stand together as one to work for a common goal. No matter what problems or obstacles we have but if the unit comes as one, We will be able to excel and soar to a higher level.

2007-07-02T18:51:00.000+08:00

Dear Lord Jesus, Heavenly Father,

I thank You for Your Grace over the camp. You had heard my prayer and answered it. Praise the Lord, Hallelujah. Lord, I will like to thank You again for the person You created me about and give me feelings for different groups of people.

For the campers side, I will like to thank the Lord for making the campers so much happier. Lord, it was in You that we know the feelings of the campers. I will like to seek Your forgiveness Lord for all the shouting that was done for Lord, You didn't send me to scold people. Lord, I thank You for making some of the campers feel that the camp was awesome. Hallelujah.

For the NCOs side, I will like to say to the Lord that it didn't go well but hope the things that went throught was the process that each of us learn. It didn't go well but Lord it is the process that matters. Amen.

On the whole, the camp went rather well except the campfire. Lord, I thank You for showing the Grace upon me and the camp.

This, I pray in Jesus Name, Amen

2007-06-23T10:48:00.000+08:00

Things have occur over the weeks and next week was a tedious week for me that I will like to start with a prayer.

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I feel both happy and sad at this moment. Happy in a sense for I know that there is a lot of people around me who care for me especially my best junior who really lend me her shoulders when I really get sad over the block Test next week. I am afraid, afraid of failing the Block Test in which I will really go into a state of depression. 2 days from now is a 3hr H2 Maths paper, 3 days from now is a 3hr 30min GP paper and a 2hr 20min H2 Econs paper. 4 days from now is a 2hr 40min H2 Physics paper and a 3hr H1 CL paper. 5 days from now is a 3hr H2 Chemistry Paper. 6 days from now is GCE 'A' level H1 CL Oral Examination. I am really afraid, afraid that I may fail. For the past few days, I wanted to do work but I wasn't productive.
Lord, I am really at my wits end, I really don't know what else I can do. Lord, may I pray for blessing of knowledge and wisdom in the examination paper that I may be able to do well in the examination.
This, I pray in the mighty name of Jesus, Amen

2007-06-18T22:45:00.000+08:00

It is long since I update this blog.....I will like to start with prayers.

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I will like to first praise Your Name that what situation You gave me was a test for me. Although I feel bad today because my Officer-In-Charge ( OC ) of the Camp was actually doing the job which I was suppose to do. This is because for the past 2 camp meeting, being the CI Coordinator, I wasn't able to give much real comments. This is because my OC have already started even before I wanted. However, I thank Lord for allowing me to have an understanding OC to allow me to go on study leave and to help me in the planning of the camp. My Relationship with my Juniors seems to be improving but it can be further improved. I will like to thank Lord for the Amazing Grace of living within me to help me in one way or another improve the relationship. As for Studies, my grades are deterioating at the current situation. I felt quite hopeless as for NPCC, I wasn't of any help but giving pointers which I felt is much better. For Studies, I somehow know the concept but was not an appropriate use of knowledge. This can be seen through the answers I gave for questions on Intermolecular forces ( id-id, pd-pd and H-bond) was a total disgrace. Another test question was,"Only Large Firms enjoy cost advantages. Thus, small firms will be eventually eliminated". The answer was suppose to be Internal Economies of Scale and Demand and Supply factors of why small firm should exist. But my answer was totally wrong. I mentioned the Internal and External Economies of Scale and Demand and Supply factors of why small firms should exist ( not even completed ).

Lord, I will like to pray for knowledge and wisdom to be in me so that I will be able to know all the facts before stepping into the examination hall. Lord, may I ask for the Holy Spirit to before me and guide me in this life of messed up relations and work. This, I pray in Jesus precious name, Amen.

This, I also pray in the name of the Father, the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen

2007-06-09T14:56:00.000+08:00

I have not been blogging for days already. I will like to Praise Lord for allowing me to get through these ordeal which I have received over the past weeks. Everything seems unbelievable. My Sec 2s do things at a rate which is fast without questions asked. My Sec 3s took the own initiative to chair a camp meeting. That was really impressive. This wouldn't have been true without Lord's Aid. He told me that the situation that I am in now is to allow me to be tactful in handling relations. I am sadden when I could no longer take Sec 3s for any extra NCO training. However, Lord dawn upon me and lead me with some actions such that I was able to take them again. Hallelujah. It was last week when I took the leap of faith that now all things seems settled and peace. I thank Lord for coming into my life and restored my life to the way He created me to become.

Upon reading this entry, I will like to urge you to think of all the things that occur over the weeks or months and see if there is a situation that is you cant find answers from? Don't Worry, Just look upon in the sky and pray as follows,

Dear Lord Jesus,
I am a sinner for all in my past life. I will like to see the dynamic change in me such that I will no longer feel the dillemma and throw all my troubles to You for You know what is best for me as You created me for a purpose. I will like to invite you into my life to be my Lord and Saviour and live the dynamic life You want me to live. In Jesus' Name I Pray, Amen

Upon saying this, may your heart be embraced with Lord's Love and see the wonders of Lord working in you. Amen

2007-06-04T05:09:00.000+08:00

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus,

I thank You for Your blessings that my parents are back safely and in the house. I thank Lord for the strength You gave me. You know that my work is in a mess and that You gave me strength to burn the midnight oil and the strength to get down to serious business. I thank You. My relations with the juniors, sec 2 and 3s have sort of not resolve that Lord, may I ask for Lord to guide me in the way that Lord You want me to be. I do not have any idea of how life is going to be like but by that leap of faith, I will listen to You for You know best for me. I seek your anointing in my endeavours and that You will call me to the endeavours and that I will be able to make disciples of all nations.
In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen

For all those who have read this entry, May I request that you ponder over the past years/ months/ days in which you feel that you are in a situation whereby you are in a delimma. I will like to pray for you who is looking at this that you may be blessed by the Lord in your endeavours and in the future you have any problems, seek His Face. He will answer you for you are His Creation. In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen

2007-06-01T22:07:00.001+08:00

I will begin with Thanksgiving to Lord.....Hallelujah........Amen.....Praise God......God has done a lot to me in my presence but I did not realised till now.. This may be my piece of word that may be shared at cell meeting tml!!!yeah

I am like so bad la.....Supposedly to be fasting for the past 2 weeks but I haven been fasting...OMG>>>I seek Lord's forgiveness for this matter.. May Lord Forgives me. In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen....

Actually Lord has in one way or another gives me the way of life...There are 3 phases...

In the 1st phrase, Lord has given me a time to let me realise that my method and my job has failed. This can be seen through the Sec 3s email and Sec 2s comments on the blog.. This may be be their viewpoints but Lord brings me to that and made me realised that certain things has to be resolved in a certain way. I failed in my job to do a lot of things, especially explaining to the sec 2 and 3s my rationale for doing something. Lord has come and tell me to tell cadets of the rationale behind my actions but nonetheless, I wasn't gifted with my words and made things worst..I was now in the prediaction of "persecution" from others about my "reasonable" actions...I was damn sad when I read it...I failed coz no one understands my actions except the SNCOs..

In the 2nd phrase, Lord test me on my faith....In these 2 weeks, there are lots of temptations that was before me and most of the time I couldn't resist the temptation and sins against God. From the Corporate Prayer Meeting, the Fasting, I really feel that I sin against God and I am doing what I suppose to do as a People of God. I really seek forgiveness on that.

The 3rd phase make me realised that no one in this world can be trusted and God is the only one... I trusted many people but ended I have nth.. So much has happen which make me come to the conclusion that I am a BAD ASS and a sinful human..

I Pray in Jesus' Name that I may be forgiven and life starts afresh. Amen

2007-05-17T21:27:00.000+08:00

Haix...I have done so many wrong things that now I guess Lord is Angry with me.
I use harsh words in my email. And know What I get? A distance increased between the sec 3s and me. I feel that I no longer understand the Sec 3s. They don't seem to be the sec 3s I know. They have let me feel that my job as a CI has failed. A failure CI on the course.
Many symptoms which I feel is coming from above though there is nothing proven on that. I feel that I had done God a diservice, I let God down. Everything around me just didn't seem to do well. This is especially so in my 'A' level School Practical Assessment ( H2 Chemistry )... I screwed it up.. I was so disappointed with myself.

Lord, I am so sorry for all the sins that I had committed. Lord, I seek Your Forgiveness and that You may forgive me of my sins. I also pray, in Your name, that my life will be back to normal and that I may get Your blessing of wisdom in my coming Block Test and Promotional Examination. I pray, in Your name, for blessings upon my parents that they will come to know you and know about You that they will never say that You brainwash me but You saved me. I pray, in Your name that my career in NPCC and Fencing will be able to soar high. I pray, in Your name that You may blessed each and everyone of them to be good NCOs though I may be a failure CI. Amen

2007-05-13T21:04:00.000+08:00

DEAR LORD, HEAVENLY FATHER,

I AM VERY DISAPPOINTED AND SAD AND ANGRY. WHEN I RECEIVE THE EMAIL ON THE NPCC TRAINING PROGRAM LAST NIGHT, I COMMENTED AS I COULD NOT SEE THE EFFORT PUT IN. THIS IS ESPECIALLY SO WHEN THE CUT AND PASTE WAS NOT NICELY DONE AND THE TEMPLATE FOR THE LESSON PLAN WAS ALL NOT THERE. ALL THE COMPONENTS!
I THOUGHT I HAD CLEARLY SPELT OUT IN MY 1ST EMAIL, THEN IT CAME AGAIN AND HARSH WORDS WERE USED. BUT THEY COULD NOT UNDERSTAND! THEY EVEN CONFRONTED ME AND SAID THAT WHO I THINK I AM? LISTEN TO ME JUST BECAUSE OF MY RANK. I WAS SO ANGRY AT THAT POINT OF TIME, IF YOU CAN DO THE THINGS I NEED TO DO, YOU BE CI, I WILL M.I.A ON THE SPOT. YOU ARE SO GOOD, DO ALL THE THINGS YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!@!!!@!!
I WAS SO SAD THAT MY WORD WAS NOT A CONVICTION BUT A CONDEMNATION. CONVICTION TO TELL THEM HOW THINGS WORK OUT NEXT TIME. CONDEMNATION TO CRITICISE THEM. HOW I WISH I WAS NEVER YOUR CI!!!!!!!!!
I WAS EVEN MORE DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF. I HAD FAILED AS A CI. I FAILED TO GROOM THE JUNIORS TO THE ONE I WISH THEY WILL BE. I AM USELESS. NO ONE LISTENS TO ME ANY MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!
O LORD, I WAS DISAPPOINTED. I PRAY THAT YOU MAY ALLOW ME TO GO. TO GO INTO THE WORLD OF YOURS TO LIVE WITH YOU AND EAT WITH YOU LITERALLY WHERE THERE ARE NO PAINS, NO FEELINGS. MY HEARTS HAS BECOME HARDER AND HARDER AS THIS HAD DRILLED ME.
LORD, THOUGH I KNOW THIS IS A LEARNING POINT FOR ME BUT I CAN'T HELP FEELING THE ANGER AND DISAPPOINTMENT. I PRAY THAT YOU MAY BRING ME TO YOUR WORLD AND LEAD ME TO A LIFE WHERE THESE PAINS MAY BE ALLEVIATED. I AM TIRED. I NEED A REST FROM ALL THIS MATTERS. LORD, GRANT ME THAT WISH. IN JESUS' NAME I PRAY, AMEN.
I ALSO PRAY THIS IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER, THE SON AND OF THE HOLY SPIRIT, AMEN

2007-05-01T20:53:00.000+08:00

Wow...Haven't been blogging for quite some time le..
Let me juz let all know what I had done bah.
Econs test on 26/04/2007 was a failure man. Father, I don't know why I couldn't concentrate to study. Seriously on 27/04/2007, PI submission, I was damn worried. I didn't have the thumb drive to edit. I was damn worried. Especially in PW meeting 2dae, my PI was a total failure of explaination. I was utterly disappointed in myself
on 28-30 April, I was having a lot of fun, playing mahjong and stuff. Though I may lose some money on the table, I was satisfied as I didn't played to my hearts contents the last time. only these days. Father, I thank you for answering the prayer. I prayed then for everyone not to have food poisoning and blessing for everyone. Father, I praise You. Hallelujah.

FAther, Lord,

I couldn't help feeling helpless and nothing to hold on to. Sins are committed in a moment of folly. I prayed that Father and Lord, You may forgive me of my sins and bless friends around me. Something that bugged me for very long. That was none other than my studies. I was utterly disappointed in my studies. Everyone in my class said how good I am and stuff. I really want to tell them off that I am actually not that great. Even my TESTs are in a mess now. I seriously don't know what to do. Why didn't I live up to the name I was given? It was just a title which I couldn't achieve yet people keep saying that. I am really afraid that I am going to be a failure forever and ever, especially the BLOCK TEST that is coming up as well as the SPA coming up this and next week. Father and Lord, I pray that You may allow the Holy Spirit to befall me and flow within me to guide me. Lord, HELP Me!!
I pray in the name of the Father, the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen

2007-04-25T17:42:00.000+08:00

Haix....This period was a bad period for me...Almost all unlucky stuff befall me.
Physics was pulled down to 41% for CA1...It is a Sub-PASS!! How is it possible for me???!!! I was sort of "mugging" for my test and doing all the homework but cannot pass...haix....
Today was the Chem Test on Atomic Structure...Guess What? I don't even know the Defination of Principal Quantum Shell, Subshell and Atomic Orbitals...I was utterly disappointed in myself

I am giving up of myself soon. I see that why I am so USELESS!!! CANT EVEN DO A TEST ON ATOMIC STRUCTURE CONFIDENTLY...

Lord,
May your Holy Spirit befall me and flow in me to guide me.. In jesus'Name I pray, AMen

2007-04-18T20:23:00.000+08:00

Wow...The day had came.. My name is not on the list of the Student Council. Initially, I do feel disappointed that I can't get into Student Council. After much thinking, I feel that actually without being into the Student Council, it might be a blessing in disguise. Since my workload is considered heavy, though not as heavy as Jason, I should actually reconsider before I go Student Council for I might not be able to handle the stress.

Dear Lord,

I praise Lord for making the decision for me. By not having my name in the list, it shows that Lord, You just want me to do what is planned for me. This is great. Thank Lord for saving me from a tonne of workload. That Lord, I pray for Jason that he shalln't collapse if he workload increases by a tremendous amount. This morning, seeing Jason in a "sub-conscious" state, my heart went all out to him. His workload is never ending. However, the quality of his work was never compromised. May You Bless him to be able to handle the stress upon him. Now, it was just a matter if Jason and Wen Bin will be discarding their post which will lead them to a decision. May Lord, You guide them to make the right decision that You had planned for them. In Jesus' Name, I pray, Amen

2007-04-14T00:11:00.000+08:00

Wow..Today was a long day. Today was the Parent-Teacher Dialogue. I was the CIP rep which was supposed to do Usher Duty. However, it appears that I actually do SaiKang. I do know that serving parents are my greatest priority. However, there was in fact nothing for us to serve as food is there and is self-service.
At the end of the day, Su Wi, Jason, Ming Sheng, Wen Bin was all talking about the class situation with Mrs Chen. We do voice out our grievances and experience with the class. Mrs Chen actually quoted from the Holy Bible, Matthew 6 : 31 about life.
I received comments on myself being quite positive. I do know my drawbacks in my studies and is trying hard to rectify. Though I had failed Physics Practical and Kinematics WS 2 which is considered for in Daily Work.
Su Wi actually bring up a point for me to consider. Bring colours to Life. No point mugging so much if at the end of the day, nothing was mould within you.
Mrs Chen told my mother that she strongly recommend me to go for Student Council. Ms. Seng, my fencing teacher did encouraged me to be part of the Student Council. However, our consenus was that I could only choose one. Either I give up NPCC and take up Student Council or I give up Student Council and take up NPCC like now.
I do have interest in Student Council. However, my time may not match. I do not know what to choose now.

Dear Lord,
I am puzzled and confused about whether I should take up Student Council or NPCC. I am also pondering about the words that came up from my friends, " Bring colours to your life". Lord, I pray that in Your Righteousness that You may guide me to make a decision that was the path that You wanted me to take and had planned for me. I pray that You may allow me to juggle my time between fun and studies. In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen

2007-04-07T10:20:00.000+08:00

Wow...Today will be a long day for me. But first let me talk about yesterday Good Friday Prayer Vigil..

Yesterday, I was so relieved. When I entered the Holy Ground in Church of our Saviour, I entered with sins on my shoulders. For I knew I had sinned against God in many ways but was just ignorant about it. Time passed and 4pm strikes, I enter the Holy Ground and started reading the guidebook that was given. It allows me to reflect about my Sins and the torture that Lord Jesus Christ had underwent. Images of the Cross of the Calvary went through my mind and as I imagined about Lord's scarifice, I could feel the excruxiating pain that Lord went through. I thank Lord for making that scarifice not just for me but for the whole Human race. Without Lord's scarifice, we would have already received God's Judgement and been into the lake of fire. I thought through about Lord's scarifice and it just make me "lighter" when I confessed my sins to Lord and seek His forgiveness and mercy upon me. I seems as though Lord had given me a second life that makes me start afresh. As I prayed for my friends and parents for things that were essential for life. I do hope that with my prayer, this will mitigate their sins and start afresh. Last but not least, I received a blessing prayer from the Pastor. As I listened to what the Pastor prayed for me to Lord, I feel the blessing that was shore upon me. I really feel relieved after the Prayer Vigil. Thank Lord for Your Grace and Mercy. Hallelujah.

Today is a very long day for me. I only received my duty last night. I had to go down to Home Team Academy at 1pm for duties as an usher for the NPCC Annual Parade Preview. Though today, I would miss my service to Lord, I think that Lord will forgive me for I am doing the same as what Lord did to me. He did me a service for allowing me to be freed from sins and I should do the same by serving others. Being ushers to serve others is a small yet significant personnel in the whole event. I prayed that though my presence would not be in the Church, my mind will be there with Lord through faith. May Lord allow the Holy Spirit to work within me and bring me to a higher level of Spiritual maturity. In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen.

All who had read my blog, May the Lord shore light onto your path of life and that you may be curious about the Love of Lord and be part of a Church to praise and Glorify God. In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen

2007-03-25T19:15:00.000+08:00

Everyday is a day where my ups and downs begins.

I am now in a delimma whether I should take up National Youth Achievement Award ( Gold ). My timetable seems to fit. However, my schedule is considered tight le. I dunno if I can hold on. I simply dun understand why I am slacking.. In my 1st 3mth in YJC, I was like chionging everything. However, now, I was so different. I wasn't like in my past, doing all the tutorials ahead of time, doing lecture notes before lectures. I feel so lethargic. It wasn't felt during my 3 mth course.

OPSS NPCC was a CCA which I hope to excel in. However, it was never the case. OPSS NPCC was like my 2nd home. I was looking forward to every training. However, my opportunity cost was keep thinking of NPCC and feel as abovementioned. Being a CI was never easy, however, through times where I will go through the mills and turn out strong. No one on this earth never gone through the mill and turn out stong. I tried to commit to OPSS NPCC. Now I know that a system is in place and my NCOs are ready. I feel that my job is done halfway. I know that I had an ATC upcoming as the coordinator. I was afraid yet look towards it. OPSS NPCC NCO 2007 was quite a good batch. Hopefully, through this batch of NCOs, the unit will soar to Silver or even Gold award in UOPA.

My life was never a bed of roses or rather everyone's life. Being late for Training every wednesday, I was ashamed of myself. However, I got to live with it. My college ends at 3.30pm every wednesday. I really want to make a prayer for everyone around me.

Dear Lord Jesus,

I have been dampen by many things in my life. Especially when the Sec 2 Squad of OPSS NPCC was like not listening to my instructions. I had relax my way of approaches however it went down the drain. It really shows that I had to be hard again which will hurt my heart again. My life in YJC and my life in OPSS NPCC doesn't seem to match. I also feel lethargic. I pray that my life will be improved by You,Lord. In my NPCC career in OPSS, I do hope that Lord, You will grant salvation to the sec 2 squad such that they may be salvage to turn out to be the best and not labelled as parasites or incapable NCOs when they take over. In my college, I pray that You, Lord may allow me to juggle my time well especially everything is on the track already. I also pray that my ATC will run well as well as the Sec 2 side. These, I pray in Jesus' Name. Amen.

2007-03-17T11:28:00.000+08:00

Today is Sabbath. Sabbath is the a day in the week that God reflect in the bible that all should rest. My mind was never able to rest. I had tried to solve the meeting venue by requesting from MRs Ng, Principal of YJC to loan the premises to us. My things went through my mind.

When NCO camp came, I thought I was a robot. I slept at 4.30am on the 1st night and woke up at 6.45am. 2nd day was even better. Slept at 4.15am, woke up at 6.30am. But I wasn't. I drop dead on the 2nd day. but manage to pass through second day.

These few days, I feel sad. ATC meeting started. Though I am the Asst Coordinator, but because I am still new as a CI. I couldnt really contribute something that will help.

Next day might be a disaster year for OPSS. As far as I know, I might be MIA for "A" Levels. Shuling and Xiangting seems to be MIA soon for attachment or even FYP. Left behind Sheng Xiang and Wei Loon. With no input of CIs from the current batch of sec 4s, I'm afraid that OPSS might not have the pillar of strength to hold them up. Though a new unit, we had broken record. Just 9 years of establishment, OPSS NPCC had a history of making IUQC into the top 10. I dunno if the current sec 3s are willing to take part in this competition with the heart and soul. I really want to just tell all of them. Notes are given to you. I'll be the facilitator and only touch up on the further details. Fadly will be another facilitator to cover up my duties for some days, i release later than him.

4H2 Life is about to commence in 2days time'. I dunno if I can cope but all I can do is to give the best shot of me. If I'm fated not to take 4H2, no matter what I do, it will not happen. For Father had already plough the foundation of the path that He wants me to talk. I pray in Jesus' Name that OPSS NPCC will stand strong forever and ever and my 4H2 life will be strong and domineering. Amen.

2007-02-27T23:10:00.000+08:00

Today was a great day.
First I praise Lord for giving me the great day which made my day. Hallelujah

I was encouraged by my CT today to take up 4H2 Subject and I accepted it. I took 4H2 subject, Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics, Economics

Actually, I found out that I might be ok at the current moment with the 3H2 and 1 H1 subject. However, I am going to take up the challenge to take 4 H2 subjects. Although I know that taking 4H2 subject is tedious, is tough as I also need to juggle my time in NPCC. I am confident that the concepts taught at the various H2 Subjects will be absorbed fast as I knew that Lord placed great friends around me to guide me in my lives.

Now, I would like to say a prayer.

Dear Lord Jesus,

I am grateful to Lord who had came into my life and granted me with many great friends who really help me out in the times of need. At this juncture, I knew Lord give me the opportunity to challenge myself ahead to soar in my lives. I'm grateful and sing praises to you,Lord. Hallelujah. I might be struggling with concepts at the current moment but Lord, I know that You had placed tutors which will mould me to score better in my life. I pray that Lord will grant me blessings that will allow me to overcome the stress I might faced by taking 4H2 subjects and the pressure that I might faced in my life with JC and NPCC. I pray that Lord, You will back me up in the times of need and grant me salvation.
this, I pray in Jesus' Name, Amen

Hallelujah..

May whoever read this be blessed. Amen

2007-02-21T20:53:00.000+08:00

Today was a great day initially but end up unhappy.

I was going to YJC for lesson and happy that my CT gave me a red packet for the effort to go down to the Annual X-country last friday.. Three Cheers for my CT.

However,things became worse. Physics Lecture was cancelled. I was very happy when I go to OPSS for NPCC Activity

However, at the start the NCOs-to-be was freaking slow. I shouted. They took the Test and I was busy marking form 4-5pm. I was disappointed that only 1 person passed the test.

Next was the RT. RT was supposed to start at 5.45 to 6.15 but at 6.15, the cadets are still at the grouping stage. I was fed up and asked NCOs to cancel

After cancelling, the NCOs still did not get the message and I shouted again for the 2nd time.

I was so fed up and screamed even at the sec 1s. I hope the Sec 1s wont be terrified and run away.

Dear Father,

I had sinned against You in various ways. My mind lost control during RT. I was out of control and I am really sorry for my actions. After shouting, I actually feel like crying. I don't know if the problem lies with me or the cadets.

Father, I seek for Your Anointing to bring me to greater heights of my life.

I pray in the name of the Father, the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen

2007-02-16T23:41:00.000+08:00

Today was a tiring day yet informative.
I went to East Coast Park today for the YJC Annual X-country.. But pple u noe wat?? I took 2hrs to go there and 2hrs to come back home!!!haix...it was a long journey....

After that was the cleaning up of my house..I was asked to do lots of household chores...I was dead tired but had to go on for the OPSS CI meeting

Went to OPSS CI meeting, we discuss a lot of things. The most informative was the ATC coordinator updating the Area. haix. kena 1 big role when i step up...sad..

Dear Lord, May I have your anointing which will allow me to breakthrough all difficulties that might come in my way in my CI-ship..In jesus' name i pray, Amen

2007-02-06T22:26:00.000+08:00

Today was a great day.. I enjoyed the tutorials ever in my life only today.. It was like so fun la...GP lesson doing Debate and research.. Sad to say, I was the one rebarking.haha..Tomorrow is NPCC trng. I really wonder how many pple will turn up.

Dear Lord Jesus,

I had come this far with Your and Father's Grace. It was because You do not allow me to sink into sins long. You told me in the deepest side of my heart, " Nothing beats the truth of things. Truth should be present at all times. " This was evident when I told my GP tutor that someone in our class came only for the test. Father sent me these words which had allowed me to recover from the sins I had committed. Be it betrayal to friend or sth of that sort. Father had believed in the power of Truth. As quoted in the Holy Bible,NIV, Proverbs but cant rmb the chapters and verses. I rmb this verse " Hard work bring profit, mere talk bring poverty ". This was the greatest verse which had an impact in our lives. This provide a direction in our lives. NPCC was really training ground for me. I had seen lots of cases whereby cadets don't turn up for various reasons. It really reflect the kind of influence it had for different kinds of squads. This could be a trial of God. He might want to test if I had the patience to train my cadets. I admit that I was never a good instructor in the eyes of cadets. In the eyes of Father, I think I never one also. I scolded the cadets for the slightest mistake made in NPCC. A lot of impact could be seen. This was especially so for the Sec 4s and Sec 2s now in which I'm worried about. Sec 4s, being their instructors for 1.5 years, I understand them well. They don't like me for I shouted at them. There were times which I really broke down. But who cares about me? Given the current sec 2s, I was emotional. I admit I was harsh and that I had created a little of that "fear" in them. Sometimes, I really break down. Why? Lord, It was really incurring my wrath when I see things are not done properly. Thus Lord, I seek forgiveness. I am really helpless facing a group of cadets who do not really listen to me. This is because I really don't know what I can do. Being strict with them, they grumbled about how strict I am or unreasonable I am. Being Soft with them, they come over our heads. Thus, it is really hard to strike a balance.Negative impacts were seen for my past acts. I'm now trying to change my style. But things aren't getting any better.

Lord, I seek for forgiveness for my past acts and that through You Grace that I may be granted salvation in my life. This, I pray in Jesus' Name, through the Glory of God's Son, Lord Jesus Christ, Amen.

2007-02-03T19:10:00.000+08:00

Lord,

I'm so troubled... I had now seen that I was not cut for a Cadet Inspector. I was like making mistakes all along. Though I know CI make mistakes as well. I was sad. My NPCC matters now was getting from bad to worse. I really feel sad. Cadets of all levels are now on a rise for revolution and the fact that they are too pampered that we can really do nothing. Many a times I asked myself or rather Lord, " What Have I done which causes this? ", " Was it me who caused everything to be like that?", " Does the problems really lies on me?". I had asked myself several questions of such sorts. I found the answer. It was me to a certain extent and the cadets to a certain extent.

It was me to a certain extent as I scolded them since they enter into NPCC. My interest was to ensure that the task was done. Cadets was also quite pampered. They complain with the little bit of hardwork.I really dunno wat 2 sae.

Lord, may You tell me what to do? May I have Your anointing and May Your Holy Spirit befall me to guide me in my life. In jesus' name i pray, Amen

2007-02-01T19:27:00.000+08:00

I hope with the the word with lord here will enable me to let off my troubles and hope that people who had looked at this will have a turning point in their life.

Dear Lord Jesus,
I am currently troubled by things that happens around me. One of which was NPCC matters, the other YJC matters and last but not least my life.

Pertaining to NPCC matters was my relationship with my NCOs. It is disheartening to see that an NCO could not work with the CI. Any instruction that was given me was violently objected by him. I feel sad at that very point in time. I really don't know what I had done which made NCOs don't want to listen to me.
What was more frustrating was my cadets. My Sec 1s, though new to NPCC, should know the expectations in NPCC. However, it was never the case. I know that I had frighten them in a way or another. This is because they were stunned when I gave them the command to stand at Attention.
Next was Sec 2s, I really feel like crying ( though I know I shouldn't cry ). It was very disheartening also to see cadets not serious. I know there are times that we need to have fun but there are also times that we need to be serious. Nevertheless, they never understood where the line should stand ( In my context ). I really don't know what to say.
Sec 3s was the most ensuring squad I had seen.

Pertaining to YJC matters, I was disturbed by the difference of attitude of my classmates. I cannot say that i'm perfect but the sense of urgency in them was not there in my context. Now came the turmoil of release of GCE 'O' Level results. I was still deciding whether I should take on an academic course. I was so bonded with my tutors but not really the classmates.

Pertaining to Life matters, sometimes i feel that i was just passing motion in life. I seems to have surrender my life to someone that I feel that my life is now a routine.

LORD, MAY I HAVE THE ANSWERS TO ALL THIS? LORD, MAY YOU ENLIGHTEN ME. I'M FEELING LOST AT THIS POINT OF MY LIFE. I NEED YOUR GUIDANCE AND ANIONTMENT.

THIS, I PRAY IN JESUS' NAME, THROUGH THE GLORY OF GOD'S SON, LORD JESUS CHRIST, AMEN

2007-01-18T21:36:00.000+08:00

I'll begin this entry with a word with Lord.

Dear Lord Jesus,
I do not know why I had been feeling this. I feel really inferior. My Old Self had taken possession once again. I feel that being an instructor for my unit had not made me better. Nobody had understand me well before except this very friend which you had planted around me to guide me. It was Fadly. I thank you Lord. My Unit had not been good to me because I had been bad to them last year. My heart sank when things really get out of hand. People had found me dissatisfied with the way I treat them. I'm sorry with all the people I had offended. I really feel that things had changed but I seriously had problem communicating with the sec 2s.
Though all this had happened, I only had to praise You and Father for You are moulding me into a better person. I would like to seek for blessings from above that my life shall be enlightened by Your Word.

No matter who and where you are. You are always been loved by the Almighty God. There is always a purpose why You are doing such a thing for God had entrusted you with such a task to mould you to be like Him. He mould you through tribulations and trials. He will keep you under His wings after moulding you. Sometimes, he might not be with you but believe that He will always be there for you.

2007-01-12T22:50:00.000+08:00

Wow...It's been long since I updated my blog....Haha... It's been fun as a whole for my YJC Orientation.. I had been enjoying myself but now, I'm a bit tired. Lectures started and things are getting going... Frankly, the homework and tutorials, I can't do. Coz it is really difficult for me to grasp what is going on...haix..in about 5wks, the results will be out...i'm looking forward to it and i really hope that i can continue in YJC and be a OGL for my own batch....

Dear Lord Jesus,
I'm imperfect. I had sinned against you in a way or another. I'm not sure if the rain will continue for 49days like Jacob or Abraham had underwent when Father wiped out the whole mankind. All I ask for is simple. I would only seek for forgiveness from Lord and ask for blessings that the rain will stop and salvation is granted to everyone who believes in you. This, I pray in Jesus' Name, through the Glory of God's son, Lord Jesus Christ, Amen.

2006-12-31T09:44:00.000+08:00

Today is the last day of year 2006. It's been a great year for me. I was satisfied with my performance in academic, NPCC and my character.
In Academic, I had been awarded recently the Edusave Scholarship. It had recognised my results which I felt was the best of all. I had achieved my Goals which my Form Teacher of Sec 4s1 ( 2006 ), Ms Low Kok Lang, had asked our class to set. my L1R5 had hit the 17pts which I had set for myself in my prelims. I thank everyone who had helped me through those days which we were studying hard for the examination.
In NPCC, I had attained the Staff Sergeant and 2nd class Drill Badge. Most importantly, I was awarded the Best Unit Cadet for my unit. I went for the 71st Batch CIBTC. It was both fun and torturing in the mind.I would never forget Alpha and Sumos.
In terms of character, I had tried to open up myself to speak up more and I had tried to be quite friendly. I was really surprised that I wasn't as short as a fuse like before. Amen.

Dear Lord Jesus,
I would like to praise You once again that You had answered most of my prayers. I would like to ask for Your blessings for my friends in Orchid Park Sec Sch ( 4S1(2006) ), batchmate in the CIBTC and my friends in the NPCC Unit that the Light would shine on them to guide them in their life. This, I pray in Jesus' Name. Amen.

May the Prayer be heard and blessed by the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit.Amen

2006-12-16T22:31:00.000+08:00

Today, I just booked out of the CIBTC for I had completed my Residential Course ( RC )....I would like to share my moments at the CIBTC RC...

On the 1st day of RC, the CIIs set their tone in which it portrayed that they were a batch of stringent CIIs...However, I felt different as days goes....I had 3 instructors which I really respect them..They are CI Yan Ru, CI Eng Khye and CI Jackson...They were great....Despite the fact that they scolded us on the 2nd day of course, they didn't scold w/o a reason....instead we improved as days goes....Just to add on, I was assigned to ALPHA and they were my sqd instructors...

ALPHA was a great squad, despite all the conflicts that we had, we were able to solve it among ourselves.....The most prominent event that took place besides the Rubbish Incident on the 2nd day of course in which we had take away food from the Mess...We threw it into a bin but was not put neatly due to the overload of rubbish...We were scolded but we reflected and felt that it might be really our fault...Another conflict was the Bunk Conflict....It took place on the 4th day of course in which the guys from Bunk 13 was rushing us out to fall in and use a harsh tone on us..They were then quarrelling for a comment made " O.O.C( Out of Course ) is not my problem"....We really settled it among ourselves...

ALPHA was also a great squad for they showed care and concern which could be seen through the squadmates who took the drinks for us and Shermine who cared for us....She was also a Trainee and she lend mi a Poncho when I was drenched in the rain...It really warms my heart....It was sad that I saw her breakdown in tears when stress in intense....Our squad cared for her and we encouraged her to take things in our stride....

I am grateful to what ALPHA had done which had an impact on me, be it directly or indirectly..It is sad that we would be broken up into different ATC group but keep on going...Let the fire in you blossom.

Dear Lord Jesus,
For the past week, I hadn't prayed to you and I prayed to you this few days..I'm sorry for that...But I like to praise you lord for you answered my prayers. Hallelujah....I pray to you that You would be able to bless my Squad mates ( ALPHA ) and my ATC group ( Group 5 ) all the best in the future and that Jasmine and Yvonne will be able to pass the soft skills assessment....This, I pray in Jesus' Name, Amen....

2006-12-06T23:16:00.000+08:00

It's been 2 days since I last updated...First, I would like to praise GOD and Lord, Hallelujah...You had answered my prayer 2days ago...Hallelujah....

So What happen ytd?? Chi Peng contacted us....it was great.....For if he hadn't contacted us ytd, I would have bought the Aeroplane shorts myself.....haha....Ytd, nothing much lor...I went to play Badminton with Christopher, Dennis and Sheng Yang.....I lost to everyone... I came in fourth....A match with Christopher ( 11-8 ; 11-8 )....Match with Dennis ( 11-8 ; 11-2 )....Match with Sheng Yang ( 11-2 ; 11-9 )....haix....We went to Nee Soon South CC to play...we had a fun time....we went to eat at coffeeshop at Blk 848.....I was so thristy that I bought 2 cans of drink....Inclusive of those I bought during the match, it was 3...haha....Feeling so sian....Dennis and I went to find Shi Yan and Chong Pang to play Basketball....However, Heaven wasn't on our side...It is either the court is full or it rained cats and dogs....haix....we were cooped at the void deck nearby as the rain was heavy...After the rain stopped, we went home....haha....

Today was a simple day...I polished my boots twice, each time with a coat of black and neutral kiwi....it shined.....Then my OC, Mr Toh, sms mi....He asked me to get a new book of the Bumboat Form for us to take bumboat to Pulau Ubin....haha....Oh ya....I forget to mentioned that, i was so pathetic....no Officer was able to make it for my CIBTC POP on the 23dec....so sad....haha...asked 4, 3 replied no..and 1 didn't reply...sad....

Dear Lord Jesus,
I asked for your blessings that everything will run smoothly in my CIBTC which is going to start on Fri, 8 Dec..I asked for your blessings for my CIBTC D'06 Batchmate that each and every of them would be able to pass the course....I asked for your blessings for the friends around me that they would be happy in their lives and Lord to grant them salvation....This, I Pray in Jesus' Name, Amen..

I pray all this in the Name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit as well, Amen

2006-12-04T23:05:00.000+08:00

Its 2 days since I last updated....So wat had I been doing for the past 2 days???

On Sunday, I went to MARINA BAY to EAT STEAMBOAT.....YEAH.....It's been long since I last have Steamboat...It was great.....I miss the taste of those food....haha....tt's all for that day...

Today, I went to Beach Road with Sheng Yang...I paid $20 for all the things I need...It was quite expensive....especially the Long Sleeve White Shirt.....It alone Cost $5.50...about 20%-23% of the cost.....so sad.....But gt my stuffs le...except Aeroplane Short....Chi Peng...We had a hard time contacting Chi Peng....He offered to get the aeroplane shorts on 22 Nov...but we can't contact him....We are worried that we might not be table to get da shorts and kena from the CIIs of the CIBTC....

Dear Jesus,
I wish for your blessings on me that I would be able to contact Chi Peng by tomorrow so as to confirm our deal. I wish for you blessings that the CIBTC will be fun,great time with punishment reduced to the minimium..I do wish for your blessings as well for the relationship between Phoebe and Aishah...May you bless them that their relationship will improve and be mended...May you bless sisters in christ that she will be better off without the Prejudice between races and religion...This, in jesus' name i pray, Amen.

May the ask for blessings from the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit as well...This, I pray in the name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen

2006-12-02T18:02:00.000+08:00

I would Correct one of the terms used in my previous post...the ATC AR is actually AAR which stands for After Action Review....

Today, I went to the AAR at YTSS...Suddenly, i felt that the ATC we attend during our Sec 2 and Sec 3 was something which was hard to plan...in many areas, the AAR pointed out mistakes and provided suggestions from the CIs...I kept quiet thru the whole AAR session as I had not been through the ATC as a CI. Thus, all i did was listen to the mistakes make by our CIs in our Area and try to prevent it the next time... The AAR was benefical but it took up a lot of time....Just the Sec 2 Sector, it took up to 3hrs to review......It ended at 1.10pm....However, I learn this...As a CI, we look after the welfare of all the cadets under our charge and we needed a lot of coordination in order to make the ATC successful and fun.....

After the AAR session, we went to Sun Plaza Kopitiam to have our lunch.....The CIs and us ( D'06 CIT ) shared a lot of experience of the CIs Level......

After that, we went to Yishun but there was Disruption of Train Service, So we walk to Yishun...It was a tiring walk and I and Sheng Yang went to Northpoint to search for our White Round Neck T-shirt...the Price was "BEAUTIFUL".....So we went to Khatib Camp....but we were LOST!!! We couldn't see any Army Market shop and so we walk back to Chong Pang to ask....But the price was also "BEAUTIFUL"...So we left for home empty-handed..We decided to go on the 4th Dec with Tieow Poo and Wei Han and of coz Sheng Yang.....

May the Lord Bless me for the Course and my frens and batchmate..In the name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit I pray, Amen...I pray in Jesus' Name as well, Amen..

1 December 2006

2006-12-01T17:58:00.000+08:00

Today is the 1st of dec. I went to Northland Secondary at 1pm to go for refresher Training for the CIBTC... I went to meet Sheng Yang at Yishun MRT but he was LATE!! He reached at 12.40pm when we are supposed to meet at 12.30pm...I thought that the refresher Training would be like in CIBTC ( as in the discipline would be high )...However, it turn out to be slack...

I had refreshed drills which I had done and it created a better impression..However, my Campcraft, I forgotten everything....one of the CII came and he taught us some knots which i'm not clear with such as Fireman's Chair,Highwayman Hitch and Double Cut Rolling Hitch....He is a nice guy but in CIBTC, I doubt so...

The CI at the refresher Training told us that if we want to attend the Adventure Training Camp Annual Review ( ATC AR ),we are to report at YTSS at 8am....There would be Honouary Officer( HO ), Senior CI ( J05 and before ), Assistant Commandant ( AC )...I feel of hesitant now to go for there are so many high-ranking personnel there...CI told us that the AR would end at about 1pm....

Tomorrow, I actually had a church service at 2pm at Hope Church of Singapore at Orchard...However, I think I can't make it tml as Sheng Yang and Wei Han did ask if we want to go Beach Road to get our course stuffs...I think I'll be going to Beach Road with them as the course draw nearer, i might not have sufficient time to get the stuffs..

Father and Lord, I'm sorry that I would not be able to attend the Church Service tml at 2pm...I sincerely seek forgiveness from You. May You forgive me and Bless me and my friend to be able to survive through the darkest moments in their lives. May You shone light upon them.This, in Jesus' Name I pray, Amen.

May Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit bless them and shone light on them. I pray, in the name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen.

2006-11-30T19:07:00.000+08:00

Today is a meaningful day for me...I went to Wen Xiang's house to have my boots polished as for the past few days I had tried polishing but it failed to shine...It turned out to be great....It shined finally....

After which we went to play badminton.....But I lost 2 Matches....so we stopped and went back to his house to play some computer games.....We feel bored so we went to pay a visit to Terrence... Terrence agreed... We played for long and felt tired....

We decided to call Phoebe, Aishah and Jonathon to join us. Phoebe did not want to come and I felt that it was my fault as I thought it had something to do with the Prom Night. Jonathan came and we played doubles.... Aishah came shortly after that to play a while...

I think i had committed too much sin that I was punished to be with her Brother...At hari raya puasa, he drew almost everything at me...today, he don't listen to me and wonder all about..i had a hard time handling him....

We continued to play till 6pm with Jonathon leaving at 5.45pm..It was a great day

I pray in Jesus' Name that Phoebe would simmer down and be able to curb her temper. and that everyone around me would be blessed by him..In Jesus' Name, I pray, Amen...

May everyone around me and help me be blessed by Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit..Amen

2006-11-29T17:49:00.000+08:00

My Cadet Inspector Basic Training Course( CIBTC ) is just a week from now. I do not know how much I would suffer in the CIBTC starting on the 8 Dec 2006....After CIBTC, I would be serving back in my unit and going for the Junior College under Provisional Pre-U one Admission Exercise ( PAE )...I think I would be very busy but I'll still update this blog at the least weekly basis....

Today was really sian....However, i notice some things, I can't even do 20 push-up at one go.. In my cadets' life, I could do it..Now, I had to start training up le....haha....I hope that frens from OPSS would be able to keep in contact with others and mi....

I pray hard for my fellow classmates in OPSS and my fellow batchmates in the 71st CIBTC that we will be able to pass our GCE 'O' Level Examination with flying colours and able to pass our course together respectively. May the Lord bless them eternally.This, I pray in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, Amen..

May you who belongs to the category be blessed by the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.

Shifted from bloodyh3ll.blogspot.com

2006-11-29T15:16:00.000+08:00

Hey, everyone....I had changed my Blog to this....the previous one, i had deleted though u can still assess it....be here to read more updates on me....